Log:Session 27 (Meta, no ontology)

[10:45] <&Hebizuka> *Welcome back to the Mazes, Jonah. You have visited 85 rooms, next special room at the 88th (mission). You are healthy, no special conditions to report. Your ally Carolyn is still there, as are your two newest companions, two feral cats named Len and Ken. !mrooms3 to resume.* [10:46] <Jonah> I hope we can get these two a healthy diet. And, you know, not get them killed. [10:47] * Jonah bends down to the two cats, vaguely hoping that Len and Ken's innate awesomeness as cats will let them understand her. "Don't get shot, okay you two?" [10:47] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [10:47] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 3993 - Front door: 3359 - Right door: 6984 - Roomstyle: 130 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [10:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] If they get hurt or decide to wander away, PLEASE promise me you won't be sad because that is something that just might happen. [10:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] They're game meat here. [10:47] <Jonah> I don't know, I'm attached. They're like my children now. [10:47] <Jonah> I'll need to be comforted. [10:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Ohh, boy. [10:48] <Jonah> Preferably in the arms of another, brown skinned woman. [10:48] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Where to, lovergirl? *rolls eyes* [10:48] * Jonah double checks that her Remington is nice and loaded, reloading as necessary, and then heads through the front door! [10:48] <&Hebizuka> *You have 3 + 1 shells loaded in the 870, all of them buckshot.* [10:49] <Jonah> ...How did I not notice that. [10:49] * Jonah promptly shoves more buckshot in there, to hit 7+1. [10:49] <&Hebizuka> [Reload] Remington 870MM: +4 Buck [7+1/7, 8x Buck] [10:50] <&Hebizuka> *Used 12g Buckshot shells in the backpack. Total 12 gauge buckshot remaining in backpack: 28.* [10:51] <Jonah> There we go. Nice and topped off. [10:51] <Jonah> ...Man, guns are way too much maintenance. Thank gods for good old fashioned swords. [10:51] <&Hebizuka> *You make it inside a regular, featureless room. A teal-colored package has been abandoned there, on the floor.* [10:52] <Jonah> ...Oh god I hope Len and Ken don't trigger cats. [10:52] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Yeah, yeah, you'll be thankful you have more than just a sword. [10:52] <Jonah> Er. [10:52] <Jonah> Traps. [10:52] * Jonah hurridely checks the room for such before the cats beat her to the punch. [10:53] <&Hebizuka> *There are none. And the cats are still pretty much close from you two.* [10:53] <Jonah> Carolyn, any chance a clothing shop would sell collars? [10:53] <Jonah> Like, for cats. [10:53] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I don't think so. [10:54] <Jonah> We need to - well, not /bell/ them, but - awwwwwww. [10:54] <Jonah> Pets aren't a common thing, are they. [10:54] * Jonah heads over to check out the dangerous looking package on the floor. [10:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Not quite, indeed. People prefer to buy -servants- when they have the cash. *shrug* [10:54] <&Hebizuka> [Bionics] Legs implant - "Electail" cybernetic tail attachment [10:55] <Jonah> Servants? /Lewd./ [10:55] <Jonah> Almost as lewd as this electric tail. because /wow/ this thing looks kinky. [10:55] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] No, not that kind. Like, actual subordinates. [10:55] * Jonah shoves the Bionics in her bag. [10:56] <Jonah> Well, no doubt. But if you're buying /Servants/ that's really more like buying a slave. [10:56] <&Hebizuka> [Weight] (Pack/Main inv) 40.9/60 [10:56] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Well that depends how you look at it... or who's the buyer really. [10:57] <Jonah> Mmm. That reminds me - I need to find this one maid when we have the time. [10:57] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [10:57] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 6130 - Front door: 6466 - Right door: 2912 - Roomstyle: 193 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [10:57] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Who? I kinda forgot.. [10:57] <Jonah> Oh - you don't know her. [10:57] <Jonah> Her name was Tammy Price. She was the first person I met, actually! [10:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Is she? What'd she do? [10:58] <Jonah> Pretty nice, helped me as best she could. Was desperately looking for a better job. [10:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Ah, one of those minimum-wage maids. They have it so hard.. [10:58] * Jonah gently pets her pussies before heading through the front door. [10:58] <Jonah> As hard as you, Carolyn? Any salary's better than donations. [10:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Even I live better than they do. [10:59] <Jonah> Well, there you go. [11:00] <Jonah> We'll earn some more cash, and hire you a personal maid. [11:00] <&Hebizuka> *A mess hall. There's only one door here (!mrooms1), but the room is infested with rattlesnakes! Five of them!* [11:00] <Jonah> AAnd then we OH GOD FUCKING SNAKES. [11:00] <&Hebizuka> *The cats hiss at the snakes, and Carolyn goes "Ew!".* [11:00] * Jonah promptly picks up Len and Ken both. [11:01] <Jonah> And we don't have any antidotes - oh god /fuck snakes./ [11:01] <&Hebizuka> *The snakes go "hiss" and "*rattle me snakes!*", probably between prayers to the Great Snake in the Sky.* [11:01] <Jonah> /Fucking snakes./ [11:01] <&Hebizuka> *What will you do?* [11:02] <Jonah> That's. Uh, Carolyn. Do you remember if Rattlesnakes can propel themselves? Like, launch themselves at you. [11:02] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] YES, YES THEY DO DAMMIT. [11:02] <Jonah> Maybe we can use the mess hall tables to get out of the - fucccccck. [11:02] <Jonah> Fuuuuuck. [11:02] <Jonah> This is /karma/ for those pussy jokes. [11:03] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Do me a favor, GRENADE THE FUCK OUT OF THEM. I don't give a shit if we're using a grenade on a pile of snakes, I'm not having one of them get near my hide! [11:03] <Jonah> Watch as I proceed to miss completely and then we die to /fucking snakes./ [11:03] * Jonah takes out her grenade regardless, judging all the angles needed to kill her some snakes. [11:04] <&Hebizuka> *They are all bunched up in a group, and have not noticed you... yet.* [11:04] <&Hebizuka> *Just in case, Carolyn prepares her Glock, ready to at least shoot one in case the grenade fails.* [11:05] <&Hebizuka> *As for the cats... well, they're cats. Naturally they'll want to chase after something that looks prey to bite them.* [11:05] <Jonah> There's no way we'll be able to eat them. But maybe - oooh, that's right. [11:05] <Jonah> I can harvest the venom sacs now. This'll be /great./ [11:07] <&Hebizuka> *So, what will you do?* [11:07] <Jonah> *Grenade, Group of Snakes, 1 throw* [11:07] <Jonah> *M67 Frag grenade that is.* [11:08] <&Hebizuka> *The rattlesnakes will probably all want to crawl towards you to attack and deliver bites... Two of them will go towards you, one towards carolyn, and one for each of the cats.* [11:08] <&Hebizuka> *Order: You, Carolyn, Len, Ken, Rattlesnakes (all)* [11:08] <&Hebizuka> *You may roll first.* [11:09] <Jonah> @roll 1#2d6 [11:09] <MazeBot> Jonah: 3 [11:09] <Jonah> :V [11:09] <&Hebizuka> *Just as planned, the grenade is thrown way too far, and destroys a table in the back without the snakes having a single care in the world.* [11:09] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's turn...* [11:09] <Jonah> SNAAAAAAAAAAAAKES [11:11] <&Hebizuka> *She levels her G17 at one of the snakes coming for you.* [11:11] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:11] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 8 [11:12] <&Hebizuka> *That bullet strikes the rattlesnake dead on. The crawling creature is cut in half!* [11:12] <&Hebizuka> Carolyn [Glock 17] Rattlesnake [B] [11:13] <&Hebizuka> *Len's turn...* [11:13] <&Hebizuka> *The furiously meowing creature rushes towards the cat destined to Carolyn, wanting to bite the shit out of it.* [11:13] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:13] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7 [11:14] <&Hebizuka> *Which it succeeds at doing, causing a mess of cat an snake snarls to be heard... but it fails to do any lasting damage to the noisy-tailed creature.* [11:14] <&Hebizuka> *Ken's turn...* [11:15] <&Hebizuka> *The OTHER cat pretty much comes to the rescue of its companion, attacking the same snake.* [11:15] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:15] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7 [11:15] <&Hebizuka> *And also succeeds at hitting that snake with a well placed bite, but again fails to kill it.* [11:15] <&Hebizuka> *Meanwhile we have four surviving snakes...* [11:16] <&Hebizuka> *Rattlesnakes' turn. #1 goes towards YOU, to try and bite you!* [11:16] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:16] <MazeBot> [LOWER BODY] Lower body (Hips, pelvis, buttocks) [11:16] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:16] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 8 [11:16] <&Hebizuka> *Suddenly a snake bites your ass. And probably not in the way you wish it happened.* [11:17] <&Hebizuka> *It doesn't hurt as much as you thought it would...* [11:18] <&Hebizuka> *You suddenly feel very sick.* [11:18] <&Hebizuka> *Snake #2 is dead, so it can't really move.* [11:18] <Jonah> "CRAAAWWWLLLING IN MY SKIIIN, THESE WOUNDS, THEY WILL NOT HEEEEAAAAL." [11:18] <&Hebizuka> *Snake #3 goes after Carolyn!* [11:18] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:18] <MazeBot> [LOWER BODY] Lower body (Hips, pelvis, buttocks) [11:18] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:18] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 9 [11:18] <&Hebizuka> *And just like you, she is subjected to the treatment of ass bite.* [11:19] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] OW [11:19] <&Hebizuka> *Snake #4 leaps towards one of your cat friends!* [11:19] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:19] <MazeBot> [EXTREMITY] Left foot [11:20] <&Hebizuka> *Closest equivalent: Front left paw* [11:20] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:20] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7 [11:20] <&Hebizuka> *But it fails to hit.* [11:20] <&Hebizuka> *Snake #5 does the same, except against the OTHER cat.* [11:20] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:20] <MazeBot> [LIMB] Right arm [11:20] <&Hebizuka> *Closest equivalent: Front right paw* [11:20] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:20] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7 [11:20] <&Hebizuka> *Just like that, it fails too.* [11:21] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1...* [11:21] <&Hebizuka> *Your skin goes pale, and Carolyn looks visibly dizzy. Both of you feel very sick just from the looks of it.* [11:22] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 2. What will you do?* [11:24] <Jonah> *I have a grenade left, can I use it without blowing /us/ up in the meantime?* [11:24] <Jonah> *Or are the snakes too close for that now.* [11:24] <&Hebizuka> *No, all of the snakes are within melee range. If you do that you're detonating a grenade in your general vicinity.* [11:25] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] What in the world should we do... [11:27] <Jonah> Kill the snakes, we'll call the hospital later! [11:27] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Agh, they'll never be there in time... [11:28] <&Hebizuka> *The shrine maiden decides to point her Glock at the snake that just bit her (#3), going to dump three rounds because angry and sick.* [11:28] <&Hebizuka> *The cats both decide to fight against their respective attackers (#4 and #5).* [11:28] * Jonah pulls out her Remington, aiming it at snake 3, the one attacking Carolyn. [11:28] <Jonah> Come ON SHOTGUN! [11:29] <&Hebizuka> *Snakes: #1 continues attacking you, #3 goes towards you, #4 and #5 remain busy with the cats, respectively.* [11:30] <Jonah> *Remington, two shots, Snake #1* [11:31] <&Hebizuka> *Order: Carolyn, Cats (both), Snakes (all), You* [11:31] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's turn...* [11:31] <&Hebizuka> @roll 3#2d6 [11:31] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 4;3;12 [11:31] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-3: Miss, Miss, Critical hit [11:33] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's last shot struck Snake #3 rather dramatically in the mouth, causing its head to explode!* [11:33] <&Hebizuka> Carolyn [Glock 17] Rattlesnake /H\ [B] [11:33] <&Hebizuka> *Cats' turn...* [11:34] <Jonah> *COME ON LEN AND KEN.* [11:34] <&Hebizuka> *Len attacks #4!* [11:34] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:34] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 6 [11:34] <&Hebizuka> *The cat fails to close its maw on the targeted snake.* [11:34] <&Hebizuka> *Ken attacks #5!* [11:34] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:34] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 4 [11:35] <&Hebizuka> *The other cat doesn't have much luck.* [11:35] <&Hebizuka> *Rattlesnakes' turn...* [11:35] <&Hebizuka> *#1 attacks you!* [11:35] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:35] <MazeBot> [LIMB] Right leg [11:35] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:35] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 2 [11:36] <Jonah> "You couldn't have fucked up /the first time/ you asshole snake!?" [11:36] <&Hebizuka> *The rattlesnakes manages to fail spectacularly at biting you. It CRASHES ITS HEAD AGAINST YOUR LEG instead. Which amusingly manages to instantly kill the snake from concussion.* [11:36] <&Hebizuka> Carolyn [Accidental suicide] Rattlesnake [11:36] <&Hebizuka> *Tag: [B]* [11:37] <&Hebizuka> *Treated as a special kill.* [11:37] <&Hebizuka> *Since. Well. ACCIDENTAL SUICIDAL SNAKE* [11:37] <Jonah> *WOULD HAVE BEEN HELPFUL IF IT DID IT EARLIER. :V* [11:39] <&Hebizuka> *Snake #4 attacks Len!* [11:39] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:39] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 9 [11:39] <Jonah> LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN [11:39] <&Hebizuka> *It succeeds, and the cat mewls and shrieks in pain as a result.* [11:40] <&Hebizuka> *Snake #5 attacks Ken!* [11:40] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:40] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 2 [11:41] <&Hebizuka> *Another hilarious attempt at failure to bite which results in painfully eating the floor instead.* [11:41] <&Hebizuka> *Which also results in a hilarious suicide.* [11:41] <&Hebizuka> [Suicide] Rattlesnake [11:42] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn, at last. However, your turn is averted, because your target is dead.* [11:42] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 2, and there's only one surviving slithering slab of sneaky snake.* [11:43] <&Hebizuka> *You are not feeling better at all. In fact you are tasting the definition of 'worse'.* [11:43] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn looks even worse. Her face looks as pale as yours and you can distinctly hear her breathing became fast and ragged.* [11:44] <Jonah> What the fuck kinda poison is this!? Rattlesnake venom doesn't WORK THIS FUCKING FAST! I'VE BEEN BITTEN BEFORE! [11:44] <&Hebizuka> *Only one of the snakes survived from this clusterfuck of failures and poisonous bites gone either horribly right or horribly wrong, which is #4.* [11:44] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 3. What's your next move?* [11:44] <Jonah> *Phone, Calling 9-2, PRAYING THEY'RE CLOSE.* [11:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Heh... that's funny... We're going to die from snakebites... the Gods have a really shitty sense of humor... [11:45] <&Hebizuka> *You are going to waste a turn making a phone call. Confirm?* [11:45] <Jonah> *Carolyn and the cats will still get to attack, yes?* [11:45] <&Hebizuka> *Of course.* [11:46] <Jonah> *CONFIRM CONFIRM CONFIRM* [11:46] <&Hebizuka> *You get your phone out. Technically you act first and for this turn, you will have successfully made your call, but for the sake of speed I will describe the combat actions next, before going on with the actual call.* [11:46] <&Hebizuka> *Remember, chronologically YOU are first.* [11:47] <&Hebizuka> *Any damage that happens to you really only happened after the call.* [11:48] <&Hebizuka> *While you're busy on the phone, Carolyn aims at the last snake, firing three rounds as well just to be sure. And in case that fails, Ken goes to bite the last snake. Len however does nothing; having been poisoned as well, the cat drags itself to a corner.* [11:48] <&Hebizuka> *As for the last snake, like a bitch fucker it is, it goes to attack YOU. Because yes, always attack the medic. That works all the time in games better than this one. Right?* [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *Order: Jonah, Len, Carolyn, Ken, Snake* [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *Your call will be -described- last.* [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *Len drags itself to the corner of the room without doing much.* [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's turn...* [11:49] <&Hebizuka> @roll 3#2d6 [11:49] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 6;9;9 [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-3: Miss, Hit, Hit.* [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *There isn't much snake that's left.* [11:50] <&Hebizuka> Carolyn [Glock 17] Rattlesnake [B] [11:50] <&Hebizuka> *End of fight! (3 turns)* [11:50] <&Hebizuka> *BEFORE the end of the fight, though... you make your call.* [11:51] <&Hebizuka> [Phone] *Dialing...* [11:52] <&Hebizuka> [Phone] 9-2 medical assistance, state your emergency? [11:53] <Jonah> Room 6466, Three Rattlesnake bites, help! [11:54] <&Hebizuka> [Phone] Please remain calm, ma'am, we will dispatch a nurse to help you. How many victims have been bitten? [11:55] <Jonah> I /just said/ three! Me, my girlfriend, and our cat! [11:55] <Jonah> We got most of the snakes, there's one left, hurry, PLEASE! [11:56] <&Hebizuka> [Phone] Okay, please instruct your girlfriend to stay calm. Do you know self-purging techniques? If you do, please try to do so. *The nurse has been dispatched and will be there in 5 turns.* [11:58] <&Hebizuka> *Just as the call ends, you watch a dead snake land next to you, the one which Carolyn just shot prior to it biting you.* [11:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Praise the Gods... [11:59] <&Hebizuka> *You can wait until the dispatch arrives, or attempt to do something in the meantime.* [12:00] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Hey... Jonah. Got a plan, before I die? [12:01] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Because I'm kinda feeling light-headed right now... [12:01] <Jonah> Open your mouth, I'm sticking my fingers in. [12:01] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Are you crazy?... [12:01] <Jonah> Uh, YES? [12:01] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Fine... Don't mess my insides too much, Dr. Frankenmaze. [12:01] <Jonah> Now /shut up and let me make you puke!/ [12:02] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Never thought I'd say that even once in my life... [12:02] <Jonah> Less talking MORE MOUTH OPENING! [12:02] <~SU_Tempest> *You are going to try and help Carolyn to self-purge and make her throw up. Confirm?* [12:02] * Jonah drags herself over to Carolyn, forcibly wrenching her jaw open and shoving some fingers in there. [12:02] <Jonah> *Confirm, go go go.* [12:03] <Jonah> /Every time/ I agree with you and get reckless we /almost die./ [12:04] <&Hebizuka> *She retches and gargles for a while... then she suddenly shoves you away before turning around. What is expected happens, and Carolyn empties the contents of her stomach (and probably her dignity as well). She appears to feel slightly better. Slightly.* [12:04] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Blargh. It hurts, damn it.. [12:07] <Jonah> Hang in there, please, please, don't die on me don't die don't die... [12:07] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Can't promise anything, if the Gods want me back then I'll go back [12:07] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] You should probably help yourself now... [12:07] * Jonah does her damned best to rush to Len now, but the poison in her body's fucking with her coordination something fierce. [12:07] <Jonah> Len /first./ [12:08] * Jonah slams down on her knees next to the poor thing, being only vaguely gentle as she tries to coax the little kitty to vomit. [12:09] <~SU_Tempest> *Len lets itself be manipulated, and ends up retching before thoroughly emptying the contents of its stomach. It appears the cat feels a lot better, except for meowing frantically at you now.* [12:10] <~SU_Tempest> *Now it looks weak from needing to eat. Badly. And that's why it keeps meowing at you, as if to say "Feed me."* [12:10] <Jonah> "You can eat me if I die, okay Len?" [12:10] <~SU_Tempest> *Meow!* [12:11] * Jonah lets her vindictive side take over, just a bit, and pets Len with the hand she just vomited on. [12:11] * Jonah does this, naturally, because she's using her /clean/ hand to try and self-purge. [12:12] <~SU_Tempest> *Confirm your attempt?* [12:13] <Jonah> *Yes.* [12:13] <&Hebizuka> *You retch, and it takes you two tries to get yourself to throw up as well. You feel slightly better, but not by a whole lot.* [12:13] <&Hebizuka> *And if that wasn't enough, you feel hungry now.* [12:15] <&Hebizuka> *Can no longer attempt restricted abilities until after 10 turns.* [12:17] * Jonah rushes over to Carolyn now, almost tripping over herself on the mix of snake guts, blood, and vomit on the floor. [12:17] <Jonah> Carolyn, please, don't go. Please, /please/ you can't do this to me. [12:17] <Jonah> They're /almost here/ I can feel it, just hang on. [12:27] <&Hebizuka> *Wait until the dispatch nurse is coming?* [12:27] <Jonah> *What else is there to do?* [12:28] <&Hebizuka> *Five turns pass...* [12:30] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn ends up sitting against the floor, having made a quick prayer to the Gods while waiting...* [12:30] <&Hebizuka> *Finally, a nurse barges in the room.* [12:30] * Jonah sits right next to her, wrapping both hands around the miko and squeezing tight. [12:31] <Jonah> OH GODS YOU'RE HERE! [12:31] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] 9-2 emergency call! Oh, man, let's see what's going on here... [12:31] <Jonah> Hurry, /hurry/, her first Carolyn first! [12:31] <&Hebizuka> *You feel absolutely horrible, though.* [12:31] <&Hebizuka> *Your voice sounds a lot weaker than it should be.* [12:32] <Jonah> *Fuck /my/ status, I'll scream myself mute if I have to.* [12:32] <Jonah> "Help, /her/ first, please, I'll be okay, please, please..." [12:35] <&Hebizuka> *She brings up two antidotes.* [12:36] * Jonah 's sight is so hazy all she can see are two vague vials. "Her first, can't wait, can't wait..." [12:36] <&Hebizuka> *First though, she checks Carolyn's pulse, because she ceased moving.* [12:37] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] ... shit. [12:37] <Jonah> No [12:37] <Jonah> no no no no no [12:37] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] *Shakes head.* I'm sorry... there's no pulse. She's... [12:37] <Jonah> Give it to her /give it to her./ [12:37] <Jonah> You're /lying/ GIVE IT TO HER. [12:38] <Jonah> You missed the pulse, her heart's just slow GIVE IT TO HERl. [12:38] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] I'm sorry. It's too late, I can't do anything for her... [12:38] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] Let's treat you before the same happens to you... [12:39] <Jonah> Stop lying, /stop lying you stupid SLOW BITCH!/ [12:39] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] Calm down! [12:39] * Jonah weakly flails at her, trying to grab at the antivenom to heal Carolyn herself. [12:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] I checked multiple times! There is NO pulse! [12:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] Please calm down, you're going to be dead if you don't! [12:41] <&Hebizuka> *The nurse brings up the antidote vial and applies it to you... forcefully.* [12:42] <Jonah> No, /no/ I'm *joining her* you useless - no, no... [12:42] * Jonah slowly, horrifyingly feels better against her will. [12:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] Sigh. I'm sorry, ma'am... [12:45] <Jonah> ...Take your fucking money, you slow, /slow/ bitch. [12:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] It'll be 300 P$, as much as I hate charging you ... [12:47] * Jonah balls up the money from her pouch and tosses it at her like so much change. [12:49] <&Hebizuka> *Money left in pouch: 895 P$* [12:50] <&Hebizuka> *The nurse closes Carolyn's eyes and leaves her body with you.* [12:50] <~SU_Tempest> [Nurse] I'll call the relevant services. I'm very sorry, ma'am. I suggest you go home, or try to rest somehow. [12:51] <Jonah> I'm staying. I couldn't trust you with her life, I'm sure as hell not trusting any other assholes with her, her... [12:51] <Jonah> Just - /go./ [12:52] <~SU_Tempest> *The nurse flees the room.* [12:52] <~SU_Tempest> *You're now alone with two cats.* [12:53] <Jonah> So. Here I sit, in quite the pickle. [12:53] <Jonah> Shouldn't have brought you with me - should have asked where you'd want to be buried. [12:53] <&Hebizuka> *Jonah's body is lying on the floor motionless... if you want to take anything from her body it's yours to take.* [12:54] <Jonah> *Why yes I /am/ lying motionless on the floor, curled up next to Carolyn's corpse.* [12:54] <Jonah> *God I'm a fucking wreck.* [12:54] <Jonah> I'll... I'll bury you with Malika, at least. [12:55] <Jonah> And some actual miko clothing, if I can find it. [12:55] <Jonah> Or - or a pyre, maybe. I don't want to give you a shallow grave, but. No shovels. [12:56] * Jonah gently pries Malika out of Carolyn's bag, and puts it in her own pack. [12:56] <Jonah> *Did Carolyn carry any of her own Meaningless Items while I wasn't looking? A diary, a memento?* [12:57] <Jonah> Oh. I could probably blow open a grave. Still got that C4. You'd like that, wouldn't you? [12:57] <Jonah> In with a bang, out with a bang. It'd be. Poetic, I guess. [12:58] <&Hebizuka> *You sift through her inventory and find no meaningless or personal items.* [12:58] <Jonah> I'm... oh, god, I hope I find an outside area soon. [12:58] <Jonah> You're going to start /rotting/ and bloating and I don't think I could handle it if you burst like a balloon. [12:59] * Jonah makes sure Malika's tight and secure, and then.. [13:00] <Jonah> *Can I carry Carolyn's body with me?* [13:02] <&Hebizuka> *You can't fit Malika in your bag, it's too heavy.* [13:03] * Jonah sighs, and starts digging through her pack to make room. [13:04] * Jonah starts by tossing out the ten rounds of grenades she has. Grenade launcher or not, she's clearly rubbish with the things. [13:05] <&Hebizuka> *You drop 10 units worth of 40mm grenades of two different types.* [13:06] <&Hebizuka> *Now you can take the M16A1 "Malika" of your ally.* [13:06] * Jonah does so, giving it the utmost respect. [13:07] <Jonah> Now... you. Oh god, I hope I'm strong enough to carry you. Or at least drag you. [13:07] <Jonah> I... I /really/ don't want to cut your head off. Pretty sure that doesn't fly with the Cardinal Gods. [13:08] <Jonah> *May I carry Carolyn's body to find a resting place?* [13:09] <&Hebizuka> *You can't carry her over your shoulder, because she's kiiiiiiind of heavy. But you can drag her.* [13:10] <Jonah> Ehehe. Ehehehehe. [13:10] <Jonah> You weren't joking about love handles, were you. [13:10] <Jonah> *I'll do just that, then.* [13:11] <Jonah> Come on, Len, Ken. Let's get going. [13:11] <Jonah> !mrooms1 [13:11] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Unique door: 5296 - Roomstyle: 527 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [13:11] <Jonah> That's - actually... [13:11] <Jonah> Sorry, Carolyn. Give me just a bit. [13:12] * Jonah walks over to those fucking snakes, seeing if any would be good for eating. [13:12] <&Hebizuka> *They're not snakes anymore, they're just pieces of unrecoverable dead meat chunks.* [13:12] <&Hebizuka> *You can literally salvage nothing edible out of this.* [13:13] <Jonah> Venom sac's near the mouth, avoid that and I'll be fine - but fuck do I know, rattlesnake venom doesn't kill /that goddamn fast./ [13:13] <Jonah> *Even the snakes that accidentally suicided?* [13:13] <&Hebizuka> *Yes, even those.* [13:13] <Jonah> Fuck it /all./ [13:14] * Jonah picks up Len and Ken, bringing them over to the door before, eurgh, dragging Carolyn through. [13:20] <&Hebizuka> [Weight] (Pack/main inv) 52.9/60 [13:22] <&Hebizuka> *You can't even drag her very far. It ends up taxing you too much after going half a room.* [13:25] <Jonah> /Fuck./ [13:26] * Jonah sighs, sitting down to recover her strength. Either she gets Carolyn out of this shithole room, or the 'relevant services' will find her still struggling with the body. [13:32] <&Hebizuka> *If you absolutely must insist on dragging the dead Carolyn with you, then it'll take a turn to get her to the next room.* [13:33] <Jonah> *Turn wasted.* [13:33] <&Hebizuka> *Meaning passing the door will mean 2 turns have passed instead of just one.* [13:33] <Jonah> *Duly noted.* [13:34] <&Hebizuka> *Len decided to run away, driven mad by hunger, and has not followed you.* [13:34] <&Hebizuka> *Remains the male cat, Ken, who duly follows.* [13:34] <Jonah> ...Well, at least she lived. Sorry, Len. [13:35] * Jonah keeps Ken close to her, gently rubbing the cat's head for moral support. [13:37] <&Hebizuka> *You drag Carolyn inside a regular, featureless room. There's a lone citizen standing there.* [13:38] <Jonah> Uh - Hi. Don't suppose you know where the nearest outdoor area is? [13:38] <Jonah> I could use some directions. [13:40] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Whoa, is she dead or somethin? [13:41] <Jonah> ...Yeah. Poison. I... I need to bury her properly. [13:41] <Jonah> ...Even if she'd kill me if she saw how I'm manhandling her body. [13:41] <Jonah> But - directions? I'll pay you for your time, if you'd like. [13:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Dang, forget it. You should leave her where she is, burials are a thing of long gone past, ma'am. [13:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Ya already in trouble for draggin her here. I don't want no trouble. [13:42] <Jonah> Then have a good day, sir. [13:42] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [13:42] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 6455 - Front door: 4375 - Right door: 5864 - Roomstyle: 187 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [13:43] <Jonah> Through the front door it is. [13:43] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Whoa, you ain't leaving just like that yet. [13:43] <&Hebizuka> *He stands in your way.* [13:43] <Jonah> I thought you said you didn't want any trouble? [13:43] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] You brought me a frikkin dead body and you think you can just leave me to deal with it? For shame, girl. You're gonna lend me a hand. [13:44] <Jonah> What the hell are you talking about? [13:44] <Jonah> I'm bringing her /with me./ [13:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Shit no you ain't. [13:45] <Jonah> I'm not letting some stranger deal with my girlfriend's body. And why the hell not? [13:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] You'll neva find a burial place for her. Leave that body be, you's already desecrating it. [13:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Fuck, izzat a shrine maiden? Man, you in so much trouble. [13:50] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Unless she's stole that baton, she's gotta be one, right? [13:53] <Jonah> I... I don't really know. She never told me much about herself - I didn't even /notice/ the damn thing. [13:53] <Jonah> What does it matter? She's dead, and I'm in trouble for moving the body. [13:53] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Bullshit you didn't. Thought you said she was your girlfriend? Yer not very consistent. [13:53] <Jonah> Either - stop and do a citizen's arrest or whatever, or get out of my way. [13:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] You look shady to me, and I know shady, I'm in that line of work too. So cut it out and help a fellow man if you don't want me to be in your way. [13:55] <Jonah> I don't have time for this. [13:55] <Jonah> *May I look for cover? I'm just gonna kill this asshole and be done with it.* [13:55] <~SU_Tempest> *The citizen already draws a handgun at you, which appears silenced.* [13:55] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] And I'm telling you that you're doing what I need you to do. [13:56] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] You do it, you even get a bit of cash. You don't, and I'll fuckin send you to your girlfriend if you love her so much. [13:56] <~SU_Tempest> *If you DO want to fight him, yes you may look for cover.* [13:56] <Jonah> *I'm wearing armor, I'm suicidal, I have a sword, and this fucker needs to get sent to hell. Hit it.* [13:56] <Jonah> @cover [13:56] <MazeBot> A static tactical shield, "Guardian" model. (Health: 40, LDV modifier: -2. AC Eqv: Kevlar-3. Pass-through threshold: 10+ dmg. Pain modifier: x0.75) [13:57] <&Hebizuka> *Roll 2d6 to take cover.* [13:57] <Jonah> @roll 2d6 [13:57] <MazeBot> Jonah: 6 [13:57] <&Hebizuka> *You rush behind the shield, but you can't act this turn. Your cat follows and makes it just in time.* [13:57] <&Hebizuka> *The citizen dumps five shots at you.* [13:57] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] You's gonna get a good whacking... [13:58] <&Hebizuka> @roll 5#2d6 [13:58] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7;3;5;9;6 [13:58] <&Hebizuka> *Hit, Miss, Miss, Hit, Miss.* [13:59] <&Hebizuka> *The shield receives two impacts, causing it to shatter; though it's still standing.* [13:59] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1.* [13:59] <&Hebizuka> *Ken hisses in fear.* [14:00] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 2... What is your next move?* [14:00] <Jonah> *Remington, five shots, Asshole.* [14:00] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] You're really not making the good decision! [14:00] <Jonah> Says the person that wouldn't FUCK OFF! [14:00] <&Hebizuka> *Your cat seems too afraid to fight. Not that it wants to.* [14:01] <&Hebizuka> *Order: Citizen, You.* [14:01] <&Hebizuka> *The citizen attacks with five more rounds...* [14:01] <&Hebizuka> @roll 5#2d6 [14:01] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 5;7;6;7;7 [14:01] <&Hebizuka> *Miss, Hit, Miss, Hit, Hit* [14:02] <&Hebizuka> *Three shots hit your cover, causing further damage - but not enough to destroy it completely. It could still take a few hits. The front panel is in pieces, but none of the shots have overpenetrated yet...* [14:02] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn; you may roll now.* [14:03] <Jonah> @roll 5#2d6 [14:03] <MazeBot> Jonah: 8;7;5;11;8 [14:03] <&Hebizuka> *Score+1 on all hits - shotgun choke bonus.* [14:04] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-5: Hit (5 pel), Hit (5 pel), Hit (4 pel), Critical hit (8 pel), Hit (5 pel)* [14:05] <&Hebizuka> *Total: 5/5, 27 pellets hit* [14:07] <&Hebizuka> *Your target is thrown off of his feet, with the hole the size of a football carved in his chest thanks to the ungodly amount of flesh and blood you blew out of him. There is no way, in any possible way, he could have survived that.* [14:08] <&Hebizuka> Jonah [870 MM] Maze Citizen [B] [14:08] <&Hebizuka> *You committed murder; a brutal one, at that, but there were no witnesses.* [14:09] <&Hebizuka> *End of fight! (2 turns)* [14:09] <Jonah> Hey! Don't be like that. He fired first - it was absolutely self defense, Carolyn. [14:09] <&Hebizuka> *All you hear is Ken skittering away; too much noise scares the cat.* [14:10] * Jonah reloads five rounds of buckshot back into her Remington, making sure she can do it again if the need arises. [14:10] <&Hebizuka> *Now you have two dead bodies on the ground.* [14:10] <&Hebizuka> *Ken is in a state of total panic, though.* [14:11] * Jonah gently lays her shotgun on the battered cover, before gently getting on all fours and beckoning poor Ken closer. [14:11] <Jonah> Come on, come on. It's alright, the bad man went away... [14:11] <&Hebizuka> [Reload] Remington 870MM - +5 buck [7+1/7, 8x Buck] [14:11] <&Hebizuka> *12 gauge buckshot: 23 remaining in backpack.* [14:12] * Jonah even does that weird noise with her tongue, a demented, rapidfire 'tuch tuch tuch' sound to coax her pussycat closer. [14:12] <&Hebizuka> *Ken meows furiously, snarling at you and threatening to claw you.* [14:13] <Jonah> If it'll calm you down... [14:14] * Jonah stops moving closer, but she doesn't shy away either. She's opened for a vicious claw if Ken feels the need. [14:14] <&Hebizuka> *The cat just flees out of the way, zipping past you and trying to find somewhere to hide.* [14:15] <&Hebizuka> *It bounces way high - clinging to a door handle,which it manages, amazingly, to open, before skittering away through the right door. Ken has escaped from you.* [14:15] <Jonah> ...Well. That was the fastest party wipe I've been in. [14:15] <&Hebizuka> *You reek of dried blood, which is splattered over your clothes, armor, and load-bearing vest.* [14:15] * Jonah sighs, her entire body numb as she makes a token effort to strip the man she just murdered. [14:16] <&Hebizuka> *Retrieve all clothing?* [14:16] <Jonah> Some money would be nice. Or food. Or... hell if I know. [14:16] <Jonah> *Remove all clothing, search the pockets, the works.* [14:16] <&Hebizuka> *You notice the leather jacket your target was wearing has been destroyed by your fire; so that is not salvageable. As for the rest of the inventory, coming.* [14:20] <&Hebizuka> *What do you wish to check out first?* [14:20] <&Hebizuka> >Weapons >Clothing >Inventory [14:21] <Jonah> >Inventory [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [LBE] (Tactical vest) MK64 Trooper: Capacity 8 units + Ammo (6 mags only, max tier: Large) [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 12 gauge, buckshot, 6 rounds - weight 0.3 [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K USP .45 12-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5+0.24 (0.74) - [12/12, 12x FMJ] [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Dessert - Black forest cake. 1d64 [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Fruit - Strawberry. 1d3 [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [Meds] White tablet - Unidentified - Weight: 0.1 [14:21] <&Hebizuka> [Valuable] Dark red gem - Unidentified - Weight: 0.1 [14:22] <Jonah> ...Oh, why not. [14:22] <Jonah> If I die because of poisoning /anyway/ then fuck it. [14:22] * Jonah proceeds to eat the black forest cake and strawberry, leaving it to chance vis a vis poisoning. [14:23] <&Hebizuka> *The strawberry was tasteless.* [14:24] <&Hebizuka> *The cake however, is possibly the most sugary, chocolatey, and mouth/stomach filling cake you ever ate. Your hunger has completely disappeared, leaving only a pleasant sensation of having eaten your fill for a whole day.* [14:25] * Jonah lets out a tired sigh as she finishes the cake off. The ache from the vomiting has died a bit, at least... [14:25] <Jonah> And... the clothing. Maybe I'll be lucky and he cosplays as a miko. [14:26] <&Hebizuka> *Destroyed remains of a leather jacket* [14:26] <&Hebizuka> [Clothing] Bottom - Cargo pants, plain color (Lower body, Legs, Crotch) - AC Hardskin - Blunt-resistant, Sharp-resistant - Weight: 5 - [Cond: Heavily damaged] [14:26] <&Hebizuka> [Clothing] Footwear - Motorcycle boots - AC Hardskin - Blunt-PROOF, Sharp-resistant, Piercing-resistant - Weight: 9 - [Cond: Damaged] [14:27] <Jonah> Nope. [14:27] * Jonah just shoves the buckshot into her backpack, before heading back to Carolyn. [14:27] <&Hebizuka> *Total 12g buckshot carried in backpack: 29* [14:28] * Jonah quickly takes Carolyn's old gohei, hiding it in her own backpack for the moment. [14:28] <Jonah> Oh - right, almost... forgot. [14:28] <Jonah> I'm in a haze today. Gee, I wonder why. [14:29] <&Hebizuka> [Weight] (Pack/main inv) 55.95/60 [14:29] * Jonah jogs back towards the asshole she just gibbed, swiping the pill and the red gem as well. [14:30] <&Hebizuka> [Weight] (Pack/main inv) 56.15/60 [14:31] <Jonah> Okay. Now we can continue. [14:31] <&Hebizuka> *Next special room at the 90th (Deli)* [14:32] * Jonah heads right for the front door, Carolyn still in tow. [14:33] <&Hebizuka> *You take a while getting your muscles in gear to drag your poor dead weight to the next room...* [14:33] <&Hebizuka> *Ability cooldown period has ended. [14:37] <&Hebizuka> *A regular, featureless room with only one door (!mrooms1). You come across a supply crate, which is labeled "Type-V".* [14:37] * Jonah checks for traps in a slow, almost robotic fashion. [14:38] <&Hebizuka> *None found.* [14:38] <Jonah> Give me just a moment, Carolyn - I need to open this up. [14:38] * Jonah heads right on over to the Type-V crate, ready to bust the thing open [14:40] <&Hebizuka> =Type-V crate= [14:40] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Handgear: Fingerless gloves. Protects the wearer's hands with a Hardskin AC. Weight: 1 [14:40] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 2 - IZHMASH Kalashnikov AKMSU assault rifle | 7.62x39mm - Semi/Full | Foregrip(I) | AK-47 30-round mag, +1 | Weight: 9 - [29+1/30, 30x FMJ] - Cond: Perfect / Clns: Perfect [14:40] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: AK-47 family; AK-47 30-round magazine. Size tier: Large ; Weight: 1.2 - [0/30] [14:40] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: AK-47 family; AK-47 30-round magazine. Size tier: Large ; Weight: 1.2 - [0/30] [14:40] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: AK-47 family; AK-47 30-round magazine. Size tier: Large ; Weight: 1.2 - [0/30] [14:40] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 7.62x39mm, FMJ, 90 rounds - weight 1.8 [14:42] <Jonah> You would have loved this. [14:43] * Jonah quickly puts the fingerless gloves on, and leaves the rest of the crate behind. [14:43] <Jonah> !mrooms1 [14:43] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Unique door: 4400 - Roomstyle: 49 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [14:43] <&Hebizuka> *Handgear worn.* [14:43] <Jonah> We're getting there, Carolyn. Just give me a second... [14:43] <&Hebizuka> *More dragging...* [14:44] <&Hebizuka> *You drag yourself and your dead weight to a regular, featureless room where a delicatessen has been set up.* [14:45] <Jonah> Don't call yourself that, Carolyn. You're not dead weight. [14:46] <~SU_Tempest> *You hear a high-pitched scream behind you.* [14:46] <~SU_Tempest> [Merchant] OH MY GODS WHAT ARE YOU DOING? EEEEEEEK [14:47] <Jonah> Just trying to find a good burial spot for my girlfriend. I'll be out of your way - unless you'd like to sell me some food? [14:47] <Jonah> I'll need some for offerings. [14:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Merchant] Y-y-your GIRLFRIEND? You're dragging your DEAD GIRLFRIEND AROUND? [14:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Merchant] Get OUT of here before I call the cops! [14:49] <Jonah> Hey, it's not like I could /leave/ her where she was. It was a bad sector. People would have defiled her corpse. [14:49] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [14:49] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 3738 - Front door: 1014 - Right door: 3577 - Roomstyle: 258 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [14:49] <~SU_Tempest> [Merchant] GET OUT OF HERE! [14:49] <Jonah> Front door it is. Come on, Carolyn. [14:49] <&Hebizuka> *More slow dragging, which the merchant stares at with eyes of a scared, scared man.* [14:50] <Jonah> It's like no one's ever seen a body before. They have to be buried /somewhere./ [14:50] <&Hebizuka> *You make it to someone's bedroom. There is a supply crate labeled SWATEQP lying on the desk here. There's a television and a radio (@whatsontv, @radio) as well... and you notice a smaller object on the floor.* [14:51] <Jonah> ...You should have gotten that rest. You really should have. [14:51] <Jonah> I was a woman of my word, you know. I really /would/ have slept on the floor. [14:51] <Jonah> @whatsontv [14:51] <MazeBot> [Reality show] Maze's Kitchen (with Daron Bryant) [14:51] <Jonah> @radio [14:51] <MazeBot> [Orchestral/Epic] Exigence 89.7 with DJ Lancelot Warren - http://bit.ly/1bgj2o8 [14:52] <Jonah> Nothing good. [14:52] * Jonah takes a quick peek at the smaller object on the floor, before looting through the supply crate. [14:52] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Foregrip [14:53] <Jonah> And the crate... [14:54] <&Hebizuka> =SWATEQP crate= [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 2 - H&K MP5A3 submachine gun | 9x19mm Parabellum - Semi/Full | No accessory | MP5 9mm 30-round mag, +1 | Weight: 5 - [29+1/30, 30x FMJ] - Cond: Perfect / Clns: Perfect [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Silencer: 9x19mm Parabellum [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K MP5 9mm 30-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5 - [0/30] [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K MP5 9mm 30-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5 - [0/30] [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K MP5 9mm 30-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5 - [0/30] [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K MP5 9mm 30-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5 - [0/30] [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K MP5 9mm 30-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5 - [0/30] [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: H&K MP5 9mm 30-round magazine. Size tier: Small ; Weight: 0.5 - [0/30] [14:54] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 9x19mm Parabellum, FMJ, 180 rounds - weight 1.8 [14:55] <Jonah> Huh. This looks kinda useful. [14:55] <Jonah> Hey, Carolyn, do you think this is worth switching out? [14:55] <Jonah> For the P90, I mean. [14:55] <~SU_Tempest> *No answer, of course...* [14:55] <Jonah> Yeah, you're right. I just use the Remington anyway. [14:56] * Jonah closes the crate gently, and moves aside the furniture to make it easier for her ally. [14:56] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [14:56] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 3685 - Front door: 3243 - Right door: 5473 - Roomstyle: 255 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [14:56] <Jonah> Front door? Front door. [14:56] <&Hebizuka> *Next special room at the 99th (Hospital)* [14:56] * Jonah starts the same old drag. [14:56] <&Hebizuka> *As usual it takes an extra turn to get there.* [14:57] <&Hebizuka> *A shooting range. No-one is using the lanes at the moment... you see an abandoned magazine on the floor, though.* [14:59] <Jonah> Let's get going, Carolyn. No fun shooting without you. [15:03] <&Hebizuka> *You make it inside a vault room, where a bank is set up. As usual, the banker and three Maze Guards are present. One carries a handgun, another has a battle rifle, and the last one a short assault rifle.* [15:10] <Jonah> Oh god... [15:10] * Jonah tries to stealthily get Carolyn through the doors - probably to no avail. [15:11] <&Hebizuka> *To no avail indeed. How can you drag a dead body and be stealthy? Your entrance alone was pretty noticed.* [15:11] <&Hebizuka> *You have four pairs of eyes staring at you, some confused, some angry.* [15:12] <Jonah> Sorry! I'm so sorry - I just need to get her to an outdoor area, I'll be out of your hair right away! [15:12] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:12] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 4409 - Front door: 4028 - Right door: 4757 - Roomstyle: 322 - Enemy strength: 2 /6 [15:12] <&Hebizuka> *You're prevented to leave the room. Predictably.* [15:12] <Jonah> *Oh god, please let me go, let me - of course. [15:12] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] You have some explaining to do here. Is she alive? [15:13] <Jonah> I... I wish. [15:13] <Jonah> Rattlesnake bite. [15:13] <Jonah> I tried to help her vomit, but... no dice. [15:13] <Jonah> You can still see the bite mark. It was on her ass - I have one to match. [15:14] <Jonah> I called 9-2. The nurse even had two antidotes. But... but she wasn't fast enough. [15:14] <~SU_Tempest> *The Guards look at each other... the Banker - an angry looking young guy who looks like he's just completed his training - seems not to buy any of it.ù [15:14] <~SU_Tempest> [Banker] What are you wankers doing standing around! ARREST HER! Can't you see she's trouble? [15:14] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Leave the security matter to us, dwarfboy. You're not our boss either. [15:15] <Jonah> Am - Am I in trouble? [15:15] <Jonah> She just... I just wanted to give Carolyn a good burial. [15:15] <Jonah> Or a pyre. Or /something./ [15:16] <~SU_Tempest> *The first guard, the one with the handgun, is an x-female who appears friendly-looking. The second (battle rifle) is female and looks at you with a condescending air. As for the last one (assault rifle) is male, and seems to sigh in relief upon hearing your explanation.* [15:16] <Jonah> Please - don't arrest me, not yet. I'll turn myself in as soon as I'm done if this is illegal. I have a phone, I'll give you my name - just, let me finish this first. [15:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard3] Oh, goodness. I remember seeing this happen before. [15:17] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] I want to see the bite marks, if they're true... [15:17] <Jonah> Then, uhm. Mind helping me turn Carolyn over? [15:17] <Jonah> I love her, but... she's kinda heavy. [15:18] <Jonah> And I can show you mine right after. [15:18] <Jonah> Or - or first. [15:18] <Jonah> Whatever's easier for you. [15:18] <Jonah> I just don't want any trouble, I swear. [15:19] <~SU_Tempest> *The handgun guard helps you immediately.* [15:19] <Jonah> Oh - oh Gods, bless you three. Thank you, /thank/ you... [15:20] * Jonah gently strips those tight leather jeans off Carolyn, just enough to show them all where the bite mark is. [15:20] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] Okay, let's take a look... [15:22] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] Yeah... that is definitely a bite mark. How did you survive it though? [15:22] <Jonah> I... I vomited more. [15:22] <Jonah> And... and the gods blessed me. An Amulet bought me more time. [15:22] <Jonah> I tried to give it to her! [15:22] <Jonah> I really did! [15:22] <Jonah> But it just - it wouldn't let me. [15:23] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] Ah, self-purging? Right... I'm so sorry to hear it, but please, you really should not drag her body around. This isn't right, you know? [15:23] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard3] Oh, gods, I'm so sorry to hear this, ma'am. Here, let us help you... Can we do anything? [15:23] <Jonah> It's, it's... [15:24] <Jonah> Can you just... direct me to an outdoor area? Somewhere quiet? [15:24] <Jonah> Or... or a morgue, I guess, if that's possible. [15:24] <Jonah> I have some C4 on me, so I can make a grave for her. Or just give her a sailor's burial if it's a beach. [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Honey, you have to understand that we don't do burials anymore since a long time. I know you can't let go, I know how hard it is. I couldn't let go of my father dying, I didn't want them to take his body away. [15:25] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Nononono. Leave the explosives, okay? [15:25] <Jonah> It's - okay, I promise, I won't. But I can't let them /take her./ [15:26] <Jonah> Anything but that. Please, I - she deserves it. Somewhere nice, and quiet, and... and peaceful. [15:27] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Don't do anything stupid. I know, I thought like that too. You just have to let them take the body away. She'll be taken care of. If you really can't let go, then... you should take something from her body. A weapon, an object... I'm sure she doesn't want you to feel sad like this... would she appreciate it to be dragged around? [15:27] <~SU_Tempest> *The second guard is on the phone, calling for backup and medical assistance, explaining the situation calmly.* [15:27] * Jonah starts shaking now, her eyes getting just the tiniest bit blurry. "I'll do anything, /anything/ at all. Just... please, don't. I... /Please."/ [15:28] <Jonah> I don't know if she would appreciate it, she's /dead!/ [15:28] <~SU_Tempest> *The handgun guard hugs you, trying to reassure you.* [15:28] <Jonah> She's FUCKING DEAD and it's my fault and I couldn't do a goddamn thing to stop it! [15:29] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Shh... Don't shout... Cry if you have to, let all of this sadness out. It can't be healthy to keep it inside. [15:29] <Jonah> And all of this is just so much bullshit because burials are for /the living/ not the dead and I don't want to feel like this anymore. [15:29] <Jonah> It's - I can't cry. I won't. [15:29] <Jonah> She'd /hate/ that. [15:30] <Jonah> I can't - I can't, I /have/ to do this, please. I'm /begging./ [15:32] <Jonah> I won't fight, this isn't /hurting/ anyone. I just... [15:32] * Jonah breaks down into dry, heaving sobs, gripping her thighs hard enough to leave marks. [15:33] <Jonah> I told her I'd take care of her. I was going to /marry/ her, I had it all planned out... please, just... let us go. [15:34] <~SU_Tempest> *The guard lady simply pats your back.* [15:34] <~SU_Tempest> *The banker seems annoyed at the commotion, but keeps his mouth shut for now.* [15:34] <~SU_Tempest> *Now the third guard is also on the phone.* [15:36] * Jonah trails off - anything else would be repeating herself, now. She does, however, strain to pick up a bit of the phone call. [15:36] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard3] ...sure about this? Oh, well, if that's the case we probably have both the survivor AND the deceased. Yes, yes, right here, please come here. Room 3243, we're the bank security there. [15:37] <Jonah> Who's... who's coming? [15:37] <Jonah> Are Carolyn and I in trouble? [15:39] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard3] *Hand over his phone* No, you're not in trouble, I've just been notified of a missing body in the room where you came from... And sheesh, lady, you came all the way here dragging your poor friend? I'm being told it happened in Sector 64... 32 sectors away from here! [15:39] <Jonah> I was careful! [15:39] <Jonah> There's not a mark on her, I made sure of it. [15:40] <Jonah> And... and outdoor areas are rare. [15:40] <Jonah> 32 sectors, not a single place I could find. [15:40] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] It's gonna be okay, all right? She's going to be transported to a morgue zone, and be properly taken care of. What was her name? [15:40] <~SU_Tempest> *The second Guard is also waiting for the name.* [15:41] <Jonah> Caro...Carolyn Knight. [15:41] <Jonah> /My/ knight. [15:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Carolyn Knight, huh. [15:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] That name is familiar to me. Wasn't she arrested for theft? [15:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] She was with someone called Jonah, if memory serves. [15:41] <Jonah> Don't - don't speak ill of the dead. [15:41] <Jonah> And yes, that's me. [15:42] <Jonah> Jonah. [15:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] Oh, so that is you... I'm sorry for your loss. I really am. [15:42] <Jonah> That's... can I go with her? To the morgue zone? [15:43] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] Sorry, it's off limits to all personnel. [15:44] * Jonah sighs, stumbling over to Carolyn's body and pulling her pants up. [15:45] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] If you want to take something from her body... to remember her, now is the time. [15:45] * Jonah clenches and unclenches her hands, taking long, rhythmic breaths... and futilely tries to get herself and Carolyn both through the front door. [15:45] <Jonah> I already have her favorite gun. I'm going to bury it with her. [15:45] <~SU_Tempest> *The second Guard stops you again.* [15:46] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard2] You have to leave her with us, ma'am. I'm sorry, but you cannot leave with her. [15:46] <Jonah> You... you can't look the other way? Not even once? [15:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Please, Jonah, be reasonable. Let us do our job, let the medics take her away, she will be taken care of humanely, I promise. I would look away if I could, but it's not just the law, it's just how it works... [15:47] <Jonah> I'll give you three anything, everything I have. My guns, my money - fuck, have my body if you want. [15:47] <Jonah> Just - please... [15:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Keep your own dignity and belongings. *She hugs you again.* [15:48] <Jonah> Don't... don't joke. I lost both of those with her. [15:48] <Jonah> It's... it's not funny. [15:48] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Sigh... [15:49] <Jonah> And yes I know I'm being melodramatic but. [15:49] <Jonah> It's how I mourn. [15:49] <Jonah> So, just... knock me out, or something. I don't think I could see this. [15:50] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Then you should just leave the room, Jonah. Do what you must, we'll take care of it, I promise. [15:50] <Jonah> I... I can't. [15:50] <Jonah> 32 sectors. [15:50] <~SU_Tempest> *The police officer takes one of your hands and holds it, in a reassuring, almost motherly fashion, despite looking not much older than you.* [15:50] <Jonah> So many rooms. [15:50] <Jonah> I can't leave her. You'd have to force me off. [15:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] I can lead you there if you want, but you'll have to open the door yourself. I can't follow you, you know this, but... let me take you to the exit? If you'd like? Please. I don't want to have to force you. Carolyn wouldn't want you to be forced out like a criminal. [15:51] <Jonah> ...Give me a sec. [15:52] * Jonah heads over to Carolyn's, well... head. [15:52] <Jonah> I'm sorry. All I did was take and take from you. [15:52] <Jonah> Even at the end. [15:53] * Jonah pulls out her tantou, and slices off a lock of hair to keep. [15:53] <Jonah> And... a kiss. For old time's sake. [15:53] <~SU_Tempest> *The police girl gasped when you took the blade out - thankfully the other two have their backs turned, busy chattering on the phone.* [15:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Whew... Don't scare me if you can avoid it... I thought you... ah. Nevermind. [15:54] <Jonah> I'm... I'm not too sure about the dragging. [15:54] <Jonah> But even I know she'd hate having me lug her head around. [15:54] <Jonah> It'd be improper. [15:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] I meant your blade. [15:54] <Jonah> So did I. [15:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] I don't mind you keeping a lock of her hair, it's okay. [15:55] <Jonah> That's,,, thanks, I guess. [15:55] <Jonah> Even if I'd punch you if you /did/ mind. [15:55] * Jonah reaches down, brushing aside Carolyn's hair to steal away one last kiss. [15:56] <Jonah> Carolyn. If the Gods aren't all they're cracked up to be, let me know. I'll sort them all out. [15:57] * Jonah gently hides away the hair in one of her vest pockets, before shakily getting up. [15:57] <Jonah> I'll... I'll open the door myself. But could you take me to the exit? [15:57] <Jonah> Any exit at all. I don't care. [15:58] <~SU_Tempest> *She wraps an arm around your back and gently leads you to the right door.* [15:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] Here, hun. Please go home, or wherever you can, and get some rest. You are going to need it. [15:59] * Jonah gently paws at the knob, using her body weight to force it open. [15:59] <Jonah> Thanks. I guess. Tell Carolyn I love her. [16:02] <~SU_Tempest> [Guard1] I will. Goodbye. [16:03] <Jonah> ...Bye, Carolyn. [16:04] <&Hebizuka> *You make it inside an office, where you see four desks and four computers. There's the usual office clutter, a note, and an accessory.* [16:05] * Jonah skims through the paperwork and the note, looking for anything of, well. [16:05] <Jonah> Of note. [16:08] <&Hebizuka> [Note] Please tell rpriest that his new password is aimi60gu. [16:08] <Jonah> Well. [16:08] <Jonah> That was easy. [16:09] * Jonah hops onto the computers, trying the username/password combination for all of them. [16:10] <&Hebizuka> *The workstations all have pre-entered login names: ploehr, tsims, rpriest, and mmartin.* [16:10] <Jonah> ...Well. That was easy. [16:11] * Jonah hops onto rpriest's workstation, and types in the password. [16:11] <Jonah> Maybe electronics will keep me numb. [16:12] <&Hebizuka> *You access the computer session belonging to a certain "rpriest". You notice, as usual, a personal file directory and a MazeNet access, but you also see an internal email inbox.* [16:12] <Jonah> Let's crack open the inbox first. And then the personal files afterward. [16:12] <Jonah> And then... maybe I can find Carolyn's parents. [16:13] <Jonah> And let them know what happened. [16:13] <Jonah> Or something. [16:15] <&Hebizuka> *There is only one email here.* [16:16] <&Hebizuka> [From:] desirae177 [To:] rpriest [16:16] <Jonah> Open it up. [16:17] <&Hebizuka> [Message] "Yeah baby, I got you your Minuta scope at last. Bitch cost me 1300 P$, you better be thankful. I heard you wanted to pimp your sexy SVD, the one with the natural pink wood stock, so here's a fancy ass scope for my baby like you asked." [16:18] <Jonah> ...Lewd. [16:18] <Jonah> And the personal files? [16:19] <&Hebizuka> *Curiously the folder called "personal" is empty. Not a single file.* [16:19] <Jonah> Well. Mazenet access? [16:21] <&Hebizuka> *The navigator takes a bit of time to open, before finally propping. The MazeNet Search engine appears, as per usual.* [16:22] <Jonah> Let's search Carolyn Knight, then. [16:27] <&Hebizuka> *Search suggests going on the Citizen Database search engine to find about people.* [16:28] <&Hebizuka> *Conduct a search for Carolyn Knight on CitizenDB?* [16:28] <Jonah> *Yes* [16:29] <&Hebizuka> [CitizenDB] Entry found for "Carolyn Knight". Loading ID file... [16:30] <&Hebizuka> [1. Vital information] [16:30] <&Hebizuka> First name: Carolyn [16:30] <&Hebizuka> Last name (or known name): Knight [16:30] <&Hebizuka> Known nicknames: "Lynette" [16:30] <&Hebizuka> Species: Human [16:30] <&Hebizuka> Current status: KIA [16:30] <&Hebizuka> [6. Other known information] [16:30] <&Hebizuka> No publicly known information. [16:30] <&Hebizuka> *If you possess a Law Enforcement access code, enter it below to access the full ID file.* [16:33] <Jonah> That's... alright, then. [16:33] * Jonah backspaces towards the regular MazeNet Search engine, and types in 'morgue zone'. [16:36] <&Hebizuka> *Search proposes to send you to the relevant article on InfoBase. Access?* [16:36] <Jonah> I swear, if this is a soylent green thing I'm going to murder someone. [16:36] <Jonah> *Yes.* [16:38] <&Hebizuka> [InfoBase - The General Information Knowledge Base. Your online encyclopedia!] [16:40] <&Hebizuka> [InfoBase] The "Morgue Zone" is the nickname of a restricted area in the Mazes, which has no known official name. The purpose of the so-called "Morgue Zone" is organic waste disposal. It has received this nickname because this is where dead bodies, sapient and non-sapient beings alike, are taken to be stripped and cremated. Objects and equipments still worn by the dead bodies, if any, are repurposed or destroyed. [16:40] <&Hebizuka> *There is further information available. Read more?* [17:17] <Jonah> *Yes please* [17:19] <&Hebizuka> [InfoBase] Waste organic material is ferried out of rooms in which it has been detected by the use of automated robotic arms, which prop from the ceiling, or more rarely the floor, using claws, cages, buckets, or some other method of containment to remove them from the room. [17:21] <&Hebizuka> [InfoBase] More rarely, personnel may flag cadavers if they die in their care or under their supervision, such as in the case of death in prison rooms, hospitals, or military bases; in such cases, bodies are typically carried out of the relevant sectors and to an extraneous room where the robotic arms may proceed to extract the organic waste without risk for any living being in the vicinity. [17:21] <&Hebizuka> *No more information to read.* [17:21] <Jonah> ...Fuck it all. [17:22] * Jonah closes her eyes, and just... rests, for a few moments. [17:22] <Jonah> *Checkout, please?* [17:23] <&Hebizuka> Checkout [17:24] <&Hebizuka> 94 rooms (+9), 11 kills (+4), 0 SEs, 2 Missions, 1 Amulet, 4542 P$ (-700), 0 Runs. [17:25] <&Hebizuka> Score: 206 pts (+10) [17:25] <&Hebizuka> Leaderboards: 3rd (no change) [17:25] <&Hebizuka> =Today's stats= (Legend: Hits/Attempts) [17:25] <&Hebizuka> Shots fired 5/5 [17:25] <&Hebizuka> Nades and rockets 0/1 [17:25] <&Hebizuka> Special/Other 1/1 [17:25] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL: 6/7 (86%) [17:26] <&Hebizuka> =All-time stats= [17:26] <&Hebizuka> Shots fired 20/20 (100%) [17:26] <&Hebizuka> Nades and rockets 1/2 (50%) [17:26] <&Hebizuka> Special/Other 1/1 (100%) [17:26] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL: 22/23 (96%) [17:26] <&Hebizuka> =Achievements progress= [17:26] <&Hebizuka> Shotgun +1 [17:26] <&Hebizuka> Brutal +1