Log:Session 85 (Meta, no ontology)

[15:04] <&Hebizuka> *Welcome back to the Mazes, Jonah. You have visited 300 rooms, the next special room is at the 308th (in 8 rooms). You are curently feeling healthy and satiated. All three of your allies seem to be A-OK as well. !mrooms3 to continue* [15:05] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:05] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 7002 - Front door: 5678 - Right door: 1822 - Roomstyle: 175 - Enemy strength: 2 /6 [15:05] <Jonah> First door, ever and always. [15:06] <&Hebizuka> *Front, you mean?* [15:06] <&Hebizuka> *Oh, right. Carolyn is still feeling excited from high libido, and her face is flushed red, but she's otherwise OK... for now.* [15:07] <Jonah> *Front, yes.* [15:08] <&Hebizuka> *A regular, featureless room. A weapon can be seen abandoned on the floor...* [15:08] * Jonah can't stop shooting glances at her shrine maiden. The shortness off breath and swaying back and forth is more than a bit distracting... Thank heavens there's loot to distract herself with. Just what is it? [15:09] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 2 - KBP OTs-02 Kiparis submachine gun | 9x18mm Makarov - Semi/Full | No accessory | Kiparis 20-round mag, +1 | Weight: 9 - [5+1/20, 6x FMJ] - Cond: Worn / Clns: Clean [15:12] <Jonah> Either of you want to carry this? Looks like it could go for a little... [15:13] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] It's kind of crap, unless any one of us has a lot of 9mm Makarov to go with it. I sure don't. [15:13] <Jonah> Carolyn? [15:15] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Sorry, I'm trying to concentrate on NOT feeling like I'm ... ugh, turned on./ [15:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Um, I don't think we need this. [15:16] <Jonah> If it's that bad then for the love of Gods, just /cum/ already. This is going to effect your aim or something, I swear. [15:17] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:17] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 5596 - Front door: 4153 - Right door: 3054 - Roomstyle: 180 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [15:17] * Jonah continues with the front door strategy while talking - berating, more like - Carolyn. "If it's that bad it's not going to go away on its own anymore." [15:17] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] IT'S INDECENT! *red-faced* [15:18] <Jonah> It's /natural!/ If the gods didn't want us to pleasure ourselves then they wouldn't make are arms long enough to reach between our legs! [15:18] <Jonah> our* [15:19] <&Hebizuka> *A messy washitsu. Most of the furniture is charred, as if it just had been set on fire. It smells of burn and smoke in here, but it looks like it has happened ages ago. There is a vial on the floor.* [15:21] * Jonah waves her scanner all over it to see what it is. [15:21] <&Hebizuka> [Meds] Vial - Yohimbine - Alertness increase, Pain sensitivity+10% for 3d4 turns, Libido +3d20. - Weight: 0.1 [15:23] * Jonah brings up the Yohimbine to let it catch on the light, before turning it around and showing it to Carolyn. "Carolyn, if you're that grossed out, you could just take this. If you're that horny this would probably just make you instantly orgasm - no muss no fuss." [15:23] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] What's that exactly? [15:24] <Jonah> Yohimbine. Take it, cum, and then we wait out the pain sensitivity. [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Heck no! [15:26] * Jonah doesn't even bother arguing at this point. With a sort of dying animal groan, she just pops it into her backpack, and ushers everyone through the... [15:26] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:26] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 7294 - Front door: 3966 - Right door: 2916 - Roomstyle: 425 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [15:26] <Jonah> Front door. [15:26] <&Hebizuka> *Total carried: 2.* [15:27] <Jonah> Why not? It's better than just... walking around in your condition. And it's one of the few drugs that won't get you addicted to anything. [15:27] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] If you can find me morphine, I'll be -eternally thankful-. That's the only thing I can think of to remove this PAIN of sexual excitement. [15:28] <&Hebizuka> *A library. The librarian is not present at the moment... You notice a box of ammo on the floor.* [15:29] <Jonah> Carolyn, I love you, but I'm not entirely willing to use /the most powerful pain killer in the world/ to treat lust. [15:29] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Fine. SSRIs. [15:30] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Or one of those magic mushrooms! Heck, I dunno! Maybe a trip to the hospital might be better... [15:30] * Jonah continues to talk even as she checks out the ammo. "There are computers /right here./ There's probably books too! And enough shelves for Raider, Ayako, and me to hide behind to preserve your privacy." [15:31] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] Box of 7.62x39mm, FMJ, 20 rounds - [15/20] - Weight: 0.3 [15:31] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I AM NOT TOUCHING MYSELF. [15:31] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I AM A SHRINE MAIDEN. SHRINE MAIDENS DON'T DO THAT. [15:32] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider quietly pockets the box of ammo.* [15:32] <Jonah> Can't you get addicted to magic mushrooms? Like last I checked I'm pretty sure that's a thing. And shrine maidens touch themselves /all the time,/ and the gods still forgive them! [15:32] * Jonah slips the ammunition into her backpack, and checks out the doors once more. [15:32] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:32] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 3825 - Front door: 6390 - Right door: 6560 - Roomstyle: 336 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [15:32] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider has already taken the ammo. Do you want it for yourself instead?* [15:33] * Jonah jolts in surprise, as the box of ammo disappears during her argument with Carolyn. "Damn, Raider, you work fast." [15:34] <Jonah> *Nope.* Front door, everyone. And the next shrine we see I swear we're getting the gods to weigh in on this. [15:34] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I don't talk as much. [15:34] <Jonah> Pffft. Women, am I right? [15:35] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Arguments in general. [15:38] <Jonah> Ayako, what do you think on this? Shake your head if you're with Carolyn, nod if you think she should, and shrug if you're too mindless to care. [15:38] <~SU_Tempest> *Ayako punches a bookshelf, blowing a hole through it and ejecting a dozen of books.* [15:39] <~SU_Tempest> *She then moves forwards.* [15:40] <Jonah> ...So you're frustrated you can't feel good yourself. I getcha. [15:40] <&Hebizuka> *A regular, featureless room. A bulk can of ammo is seen on the floor.* [15:41] <Jonah> More ammo? Alright, then - what do we have here? [15:41] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] Bulk can of 5.56x45mm NATO, FMJ, 1000 rounds - [533/1000] - Weight: 5.33 [15:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Well... *He smirks.* [15:42] <~SU_Tempest> *Cue him hauling the entire can in his backpack, and mumbling something about "never enough ammo".* [15:43] <Jonah> Annnnd you're set for the rest of your contract. [15:43] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:43] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 4792 - Front door: 2570 - Right door: 4162 - Roomstyle: 155 - Enemy strength: 3 /6 [15:43] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I'm set for a combat lifetime. [15:43] <Jonah> Front door again. [15:43] <Jonah> You say that like combat lifetimes are shorter than regular ones. [15:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] If you had the time to shoot 500 rounds in your lifetime of combat, chances are you've lived long enough. [15:45] <&Hebizuka> *A grassy, featureless room. A crocodile occupies the room... It seems to be guarding an object under its claws.* [15:46] <Jonah> ...Crocodile meat is pretty tasty, but I'm not sure if Carolyn can handle it. [15:46] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Everything you say sounds like innuendo! [15:47] <Jonah> Like that! See? I like sex too, but I don't want her shooting when she's distracted! [15:47] <Jonah> You now what, fuck it, I'm just gonna shotgun its head a few times. [15:48] <Jonah> *Protecta, crocodile's head, three shots.* [15:49] <&Hebizuka> *The crocodile suddenly rushes towards you to try and bite you!* [15:50] <&Hebizuka> *Raider quickly reacts and draws his ARX, dumping six rounds in semi-auto at the croc.* [15:50] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn opts not to act for now. Ayako will try to punch the saurian.* [15:50] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: Crocodile, You, Raider, Ayako* [15:51] <&Hebizuka> *Croc's turn...* [15:51] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [15:51] <MazeBot> [HEAD] Face [15:51] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [15:51] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 8 [15:51] <&Hebizuka> *Miss! But just by mere inches!* [15:51] <&Hebizuka> *You watch a crocodile jaw close in right in front of your nose.* [15:51] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn. You may roll now.* [15:51] <Jonah> @roll 3#2d6 [15:51] <MazeBot> Jonah: 11;7;10 [15:53] <&Hebizuka> *Aiming at head: Score-1. Shotgun choke: Score+1.* [15:53] <&Hebizuka> *Pellets that hit: 9, 8, 5. Total: 22.* [15:53] <&Hebizuka> *Crocodiles are tough, but the shotgun is superior.* [15:53] <&Hebizuka> Jonah [Protecta] Crocodile /H\ [15:53] <&Hebizuka> *End of fight! (1 turn)* [15:53] <&Hebizuka> [Score] Shotgun +1pt [15:54] * Jonah sits down and reloads the Protecta to full capacity with, what else, buckshot. [15:54] <Jonah> Raider, do me a favor and check what it was guarding? [15:54] <&Hebizuka> *All done. 12 gauge buckshot remaining in backpack: 77.* [15:55] <&Hebizuka> *Raider approaches and checks.* [15:55] <&Hebizuka> [Item] A roll of duct tape [8/10]. A roll of colored, heavy duty, fire-resistant duct tape, which can be used up to 10 times for crafting purposes. - [Color: Magenta] [15:55] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Pink tape. [15:56] <Jonah> Kinky. I can think of a lot of uses for that. [15:56] <Jonah> Hand it over? [15:56] <~SU_Tempest> *He passes it to you.* [15:57] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 57.64/60 [15:58] <Jonah> So, Carolyn, why didn't you fire? [15:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I can barely walk straight... [15:58] <Jonah> ...Christ, is it actually getting /worse?/ [15:59] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] No, it's just a pain in the... to aim! [15:59] <Jonah> I, uh - Carolyn, honey... I think the gods would prefer that you got some release and came back down as opposed to, you know.... dying? [16:00] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] *Grumble* [16:00] * Jonah sits down to butcher the crocodile meat in the meantime. Waste not want not. [16:00] <&Hebizuka> *You butcher the crocodile using your KA-BAR knife. You have harvested the following:* [16:01] <Jonah> If it's so bad that you can't aim, then it's /actually life-threatening./ And we don't have a way to take care of it other than, well, you know. [16:02] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Meat - Raw game meat, crocodile - 126+1d126 - 25% Nausea (3 turns) - [Quantity: 63] [16:03] * Jonah yearns for the days where she could just set all the meat on fire and be done with it. Unfortunately, she has to stick with sticking one meat inside her belt pouch, and two in her backpack. [16:03] <Jonah> Raider, Carolyn, take your fill. If we can sell enough we'll be... kinda-sorta good. [16:06] <&Hebizuka> [Belt/Main] 3/3 [16:06] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 59.64/60 [16:07] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Already got some aer dragon from before... [16:07] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I'll take five. I want to save space. [16:08] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Fine... I'll take ten, then. [16:08] <&Hebizuka> *There are 45 pieces left.* [16:08] <Jonah> ...Carolyn, are you sure you can handle it? It sounds like a stiff breeze could knock you to the ground. [16:09] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [16:09] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 2042 - Front door: 6998 - Right door: 6504 - Roomstyle: 352 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [16:10] <Jonah> ...Sector 69? The gods are telling us something. [16:10] <Jonah> Through the front door! [16:21] <&Hebizuka> *A regular, featureless room again. It looks like this room is empty.* [16:23] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [16:23] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 6341 - Front door: 727 - Right door: 7085 - Roomstyle: 252 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [16:24] * Jonah can't keep going on like a broken record. For now, she'll just keep on with the front door theme. [16:28] <&Hebizuka> *A bar. The barkeep is present as always, shotgun on the back, shotgun shell bandoliers on the thighs, full of green shells; indicating slugs. There is only one door ahead (!mrooms1), and you can hear music on the @radio playing. There is no other patron here, and you notice an abandoned weapon on one of the tables.* [16:30] <Jonah> @radio [16:30] <MazeBot> [Alternative/Punk rock] Generation Kill FM with DJ Dexter - http://bit.ly/1cQC9b7 [16:30] <Jonah> Oh thank fuck it's not Sandstorm. [16:31] <Jonah> Carolyn, do you need a breather? Maybe a drink will calm you down a bit. [16:35] * Jonah sighs and waits for her to answer while checking out the weapon. What is it? [16:35] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] No thanks for the drink... [16:39] <Jonah> Drinks don't really mellow you out, do they? [16:39] <Jonah> *abandoned weapon?* [16:39] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I just don't feel like it right now. Getting drunk is the last thing I want. [16:41] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 2 - IWI Tavor X95 assault rifle | 5.45x39mm - Semi/Full | Light[X300,97%] | X95 30-round mag, +1 | Weight: 9 - [15+1/30, 16x FMJ] - Cond: Good / Clns: Dirty [16:44] <Jonah> What I wouldn't give for a portable dialysis machine right now. [16:44] <Jonah> !mdoors1 [16:44] <Jonah> !mrooms1 [16:44] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Unique door: 1537 - Roomstyle: 147 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [16:44] <Jonah> Let's get going, I guess. [16:45] <&Hebizuka> *Hub room. Left: Next mission. Right: Weapon shop. Where to?* [16:49] <Jonah> *Right* [16:52] <&Hebizuka> *You reach a weapon shop. The weapons merchant stands ready to service.* [16:53] <Jonah> ...Nuts, all I have is the Battle Rifle to sale. [16:53] <Jonah> How about you two? [16:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Zilch. [16:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I got nothing I'm willing to sell. [16:57] <Jonah> Nuts. [16:57] * Jonah hands over the fancy, absolutely black market battle rifle. [16:57] <Jonah> Here ya go, Sir! [16:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Dealer] And you want to... sell this? [17:01] <Jonah> Yup yup. [17:01] <Jonah> It's not my thing, and I need the cash. [17:02] <Jonah> Er, not my cup of tea, I mean. I like to get up close and personal. [17:04] <&Hebizuka> =SELL= [17:04] <&Hebizuka> H&K HK417 - 700 P$ [17:04] <&Hebizuka> 14x 7.62x51mm NATO, FMJ - 28 P$ [17:04] <&Hebizuka> Muzzle brake, 7.62x51mm NATO - 125 P$ [17:04] <&Hebizuka> Reflex sight, EOTech 553 - 225 P$ [17:04] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL: 1078 P$ [17:04] <~SU_Tempest> *Confirm sale?* [17:06] <Jonah> *Yup.* [17:06] <~SU_Tempest> *Weapon sold!* [17:07] <Jonah> Annnnd I now have your next paycheck, Raider. [17:07] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Hooray. *Dull* [17:07] <Jonah> Man, you're no fun sometimes. [17:07] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I know. [17:07] * Jonah shoves the 1078 P$ into her pouches! [17:08] <&Hebizuka> *Total carried: 2428 P$ - 2000 in pouch, 428 in backpack* [17:08] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 49.92/60 [17:08] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Hey, shopkeep. I got a thing for sale too. [17:09] <~SU_Tempest> *He offers his Ithaca 37, 7 buckshot, 30 slugs and 5 incendiary slugs for sale.* [17:09] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I realized I could do with something better than this. [17:11] <Jonah> YOU HAD 5 INCENDIARIES! WE COULD HAVE COOKED THAT CROC AND EATEN LIKE KINGS. [17:11] <Jonah> Give me those, will ya? And the seven buckshot. [17:11] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] ... Fine. *He hands you the requested shells.* [17:12] <~SU_Tempest> *He also unloads the buckshot from the Ithaca, pumping each shell out, each of which fly in your direction.* [17:12] <~SU_Tempest> *This amounts to 12 shells of buckshot total, and 5 incendiary slugs.* [17:12] <&Hebizuka> *Total carried: Buckshot x89 in backpack, I-Slug x5 in backpack* [17:13] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider obtains 440 P$ from his sale.* [17:13] <~SU_Tempest> *He asks to see what wares the shop has for sale.* [17:14] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Damn. No good submachine gun. Oh well. [17:15] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Any of you need anything? [17:15] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Jonah? More shells maybe? He has some for sale. [17:16] <Jonah> I have enough buckshot to last a while. And I can't actually carry much more, sooo. [17:17] * Jonah shrugs - and then hands Raider the 428 P$ that are in her pack. [17:17] <~SU_Tempest> *The merc then orders an M67 grenade, plopping down the 100 coins the shop asks for it. He then equips it, and pockets the rest of his cash.* [17:17] <Jonah> Hold onto this, will ya? [17:17] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Sure. [17:17] <Jonah> Actually, wait. [17:17] <Jonah> Uh - Sir, /how/ many grenades do you have? [17:18] <~SU_Tempest> [Merch] M67s? Got four left in stock. [17:18] <Jonah> I'll take all four. [17:18] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider plops down 400 of the 428 you gave him to pay for them.* [17:18] * Jonah plops down the 400 P$ she was about to hand over to Raider, leaving 28 in s - welp. [17:18] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider has quicker wits. :P* [17:18] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 4 - M67 fragmentation grenades. May send between 0 and 12 shrapnel on targets upon exploding. Weight: 1/item - [Quantity: 4] [17:19] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I still have some grenade real estate here... [17:19] <Jonah> That's the plan. Hold onto these things gingerly - don't squeeze too tightly, ya hear? [17:20] <Jonah> *Worst innuendo ever, but if it works it works. Either way she hands all four over.* [17:20] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I can equip two, I'll spare the rest. [17:20] <&Hebizuka> *And the shrine maiden does as such, ignoring your balls-grabbing innuendo.* [17:23] <~SU_Tempest> [Dealer] Will that be all, gents? [17:23] <Jonah> Well, if you can equip two, I can just equip the other two. [17:24] <&Hebizuka> *You cannot. You carry four grenades (M67, AN/M14, two M7A3) already.* [17:28] * Jonah unequips both tear gas grenades and plops them in front of the dealer. [17:29] <Jonah> I'd like to sell these. And /now/ I can equip two. [17:29] <~SU_Tempest> *The shop offers 100 P$ to buy them both. Accept?* [17:31] <Jonah> *Mhmm.* [17:32] <&Hebizuka> *Raider holds on the cash, and Carolyn passes you the extra exploding baseballs for you to equip.* [17:33] <Jonah> There we go. [17:33] <Jonah> Now we're done. Thanks for the business! [17:33] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [17:33] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 595 - Front door: 6121 - Right door: 1824 - Roomstyle: 399 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [17:33] <~SU_Tempest> [Dealer] You as well! [17:33] <Jonah> Front door, everyone. [17:33] <~SU_Tempest> *Next special room at the 315th.* [17:34] <&Hebizuka> *Another washitsu, with the usual furniture. No TV, no radio, just drawers, a futon, and a heated table. ...and a weapon on the floor.* [17:37] <Jonah> Mmmmmm. [17:38] <Jonah> Raider, check out the weapon for me? I'm gonna dig through the drawers for stuff. [17:38] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 3 - Glock 31 pistol | .357 SIG - Semi-auto | Laser[SCV4,49%] | Glock .40/.357 15-round mag, +1 | Weight: 3 - [13+1/15, 14x FMJ] - Cond: Good / Clns: Clean [17:38] <&Hebizuka> *You find food in one of the drawers!* [17:38] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Canned goods - Crab meat, canned, 170g. 141kcal - Weight: 0.5 [17:39] <Jonah> Oh hey, another glock! And fod! [17:40] * Jonah stashes the delicious meat in her backpack, while equipping the sidearm in her TW slot. [17:40] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Hm. The .357 Glock. Gonna be tough to find ammo for it. [17:40] <Jonah> Who cares about the ammo, I just want to sell it. [17:43] <&Hebizuka> *Glock 31 equipped in TW slot.* [17:44] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [17:44] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 7511 - Front door: 4859 - Right door: 320 - Roomstyle: 205 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [17:44] <Jonah> Front door - unless Carolyn would like to use the tonkatsu for a minute. [17:44] <~SU_Tempest> *She follows.* [17:45] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 46.99/60 [17:46] <&Hebizuka> *An empty workshop, which used to be the workplace of an engineer. Hardly anything was left, except an item on the floor, and a box of ammo.* [17:46] * Jonah skims over the loot. What do we have, exactly? [17:47] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] Box of 12 gauge, flechette, 5 rounds - [4/5] - Weight: 0.2 [17:47] <&Hebizuka> [Item] A .454 Casull pistol magazine. It doesn't fit any known standard firearm in the Mazes, but maybe it can fit something custom? [17:47] <&Hebizuka> *.454 magazine: [0/7, Empty]* [17:48] <Jonah> More flechette is always good. Yoink! [17:49] <&Hebizuka> *Total carried: 15 in backpack.* [17:49] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 47.19/60 [17:51] <Jonah> !mroms3 [17:51] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [17:51] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 4067 - Front door: 6470 - Right door: 2907 - Roomstyle: 95 - Enemy strength: 2 /6 [17:51] <Jonah> There we go - front door. [17:52] <&Hebizuka> *A grassy, featureless room. A group of three black bears occupies this room... and these are sitting near a weapon. To reach it, the bears may need to be dispatched!* [17:55] <Jonah> You know what? [17:55] <Jonah> Bears are cool in my book. [17:56] <Jonah> Let's not piss off three angry bears. [17:56] <Jonah> *May I walk around them to reach the doors?* [17:56] <&Hebizuka> *You may, but your allies must roll to escape silently.* [17:57] <Jonah> *The bears are already hostile?* [17:58] <~SU_Tempest> *It takes a roll to escape... not for you, due to Ninja Speed.* [17:58] <~SU_Tempest> *And yes, bears are hostile.* [17:58] <Jonah> *Wonderful. IN THAT CASE.* [18:00] <Jonah> You know what - we all have grenades. [18:00] <Jonah> Let's just throw them. [18:00] <Jonah> Carolyn, you don't have to since your aim's... kinda shit. [18:01] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn won't attack. Raider will prepare to throw a MkIIIA2.* [18:01] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako won't attack either.* [18:01] <&Hebizuka> *What will you throw?* [18:02] <Jonah> *M67.* [18:03] <&Hebizuka> *The bears charge! The first one attempts attacking Ayako, going to try and claw her. The second one charges Raider, attempting a paw strike. The third actually follows the first one, attacking Ayako as well.* [18:03] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: Raider, You, Bear 1, Bear 3, Bear 2.* [18:03] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's turn...* [18:03] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:03] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 3 [18:04] <&Hebizuka> *He throws too far, and the grenade misses, exploding in the back.* [18:04] <Jonah> FUCKING GRENADES. [18:04] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn. You may roll now.* [18:04] <Jonah> @roll 2d6 [18:04] <MazeBot> Jonah: 10 [18:05] <&Hebizuka> *Close-hit! Your grenade lands near Bear 1 then detonates.* [18:05] <&Hebizuka> *The little sploding baseball sends 6 frag shrapnel on each of the ursines.* [18:07] <&Hebizuka> *They are wounded by the blast and the shrapnel, but not instantly killed, unfortunately.* [18:07] <&Hebizuka> *This isn't enough to make the bears reconsider, and they go on with their attack.* [18:07] <&Hebizuka> *Bear 1...* [18:07] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:07] <MazeBot> [LIMB] Right leg [18:07] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:07] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 9 [18:08] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako receives a bear's claw in the leg. Not that it matters a whole lot because it failed to damage her.* [18:08] <&Hebizuka> *Bear 3...* [18:08] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:08] <MazeBot> [UPPER BODY] Upper body (Stomach, guts, lower back) [18:08] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:08] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 5 [18:09] <&Hebizuka> *Another claw flies, but fails to hit Ayako.* [18:09] <&Hebizuka> *Bear 2...* [18:09] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:09] <MazeBot> [UPPER BODY] Torso (Chest, back) [18:09] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:09] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 8 [18:09] <Jonah> We're throwing two grenades each next time. [18:09] <&Hebizuka> *Raider on the other hand, is struck by the blunt force of a bear's paw smashing in the chest.* [18:10] <&Hebizuka> *Fortunately, his vest prevents him from suffering major injuries, and gets out of this with a bruise and some pain.* [18:10] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Son of a cunt... [18:10] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1.* [18:10] <&Hebizuka> *All of the bears are bleeding.* [18:11] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 2. Next move?* [18:11] <Jonah> This is dumb, so dumb. What a waste! [18:11] <Jonah> *Protecta, two shots, Bear 2.* [18:12] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider raises his ARX, and fires three times at Bear 1, then three times at Bear 3.* [18:12] <~SU_Tempest> *Semi auto, at their chests. [18:12] <~SU_Tempest> *Carolyn can't stay inactive, uses her P90, and opens fire on Bear 2 and Bear 3, 6 shots for each, in full auto.* [18:13] <~SU_Tempest> *Ayako decides to try hulksmashing Bear 3 with one of her fists.* [18:13] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #1 converges towards you and attacks, going to try and paw strike you.* [18:13] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #2 will do the same, but again on Ayako.* [18:13] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #3 rushes towards Carolyn to try and bite her.* [18:15] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: Carolyn, Bear3, Bear2, Bear1, You, Raider, Ayako.* [18:15] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's turn...* [18:15] <&Hebizuka> @roll 6#2d6 Bear 2 [18:15] <MazeBot> Hebizuka, Bear 2: 2;5;6;5;4;4 [18:15] <&Hebizuka> @roll 6#2d6 Bear 3 [18:15] <MazeBot> Hebizuka, Bear 3: 12;6;4;3;4;3 [18:15] <&Hebizuka> *Malfunction check: PASS - no malf this turn.* [18:16] <&Hebizuka> *Vs Bear 2, shots 1-6: Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss* [18:16] <&Hebizuka> *Vs Bear 3, shots 1-6: Critical hit, Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss.* [18:16] <&Hebizuka> *Total 1/12 hits* [18:17] <&Hebizuka> *The ONE bullet Carolyn managed to land on #3 seems to have struck something painful, as it has managed to destabilize the ursine enough to watch him being STOPPED, if only for a few seconds, before spasming. Of course, it's far from enough for a kill, but your team will take whatever they can do...* [18:18] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #3... [18:18] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:18] <MazeBot> [UPPER BODY] Upper body (Stomach, guts, lower back) [18:18] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:18] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 11 [18:19] <&Hebizuka> *Despite the shot, Bear #3 moves in and bites Carolyn in the side. Her Kevlar vest is in the way to protect and dampen somewhat the damage... but it is insufficient to prevent an injury.* [18:19] <&Hebizuka> *The bite takes out a bit of flesh, causing an open wound.* [18:20] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #2...* [18:20] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:20] <MazeBot> [UPPER BODY] Upper body (Stomach, guts, lower back) [18:20] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:20] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 2 [18:20] <&Hebizuka> *The bear fails to paw strike Ayako, and instead smashes itself into Ayako's fist, headfirst.* [18:21] <&Hebizuka> *It receives a MIGHTY punch in the cranium.* [18:22] <&Hebizuka> *This causes more pain to the ursine... But still, it has survived.* [18:22] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #1...* [18:22] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:22] <MazeBot> [LIMB] Left leg [18:22] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:22] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 6 [18:23] <&Hebizuka> *It swiped, but it failed to hit you.* [18:23] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn. You may roll now.* [18:25] <Jonah> @roll 2#2d6 [18:25] <MazeBot> Jonah: 8;9 [18:26] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-2: 2 pellets, 4 pellets.* [18:27] <&Hebizuka> *You deliver six pellets to #2's torso area, causing it to suffer further pain and damage... though it looks like there's not much on the "damage" side. Nevertheless, Bear #2 crumbles at your feet and blacks out.* [18:28] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's turn...* [18:28] <&Hebizuka> @roll 3#2d6 [18:28] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7;9;2 [18:28] <&Hebizuka> @roll 3#2d6 [18:28] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 3;5;3 [18:28] <&Hebizuka> *Malfunction check: PASS. No malfunction.* [18:29] <&Hebizuka> *Vs Bear 1: Hit, Hit, Miss.* [18:29] <&Hebizuka> *Vs Bear 3: Miss, Miss, Miss.* [18:29] <&Hebizuka> *You hear Raider curse.* [18:29] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] DAMMIT, I'M OUT OF AMMO [18:30] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #1 receives two armor piercing rounds in the torso, which, predictably, cause more damage and more bleeding. It also crumbles on the floor, blacking out.* [18:31] <&Hebizuka> *#3 however, is still just fine...* [18:31] <&Hebizuka> *But here comes Ayako's turn!* [18:31] <&Hebizuka> *She rears herself, and prepares to throw a mighty punch to Bear #3!* [18:31] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:31] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 4 [18:31] <&Hebizuka> *Which she fails, by swooshing a whole lot of air.* [18:31] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 2...* [18:32] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn is bleeding. So are all of the bears.* [18:32] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #2 wakes up!* [18:32] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 3. What is your next move?* [18:36] * Jonah is strangely serene - or disconnected is probably the better term. She draws the new glock in a flash! "This is dumb. This is /so dumb."/ [18:36] <Jonah> *Glock, 6 shots semi-auto, Bear 2.* [18:37] <Jonah> I feel /dirty/ using this thing. [18:37] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn will attempt the same tactic as before. 6 shots full auto, against Bears 2 and 3.* [18:38] <&Hebizuka> *Raider is forced to switch to his M9, and fires as many times as possible on #3.* [18:38] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako goes for the HULKSMASH again, on #3 once more.* [18:38] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #1 is still passed out and can't attack.* [18:38] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #2 attacks Raider by trying to bite him!* [18:39] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #3 charges you yet again, with the same intention to bite!* [18:39] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: Raider, You, Carolyn, Bear 2, Bear 3, Ayako.* [18:39] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's turn...* [18:39] <&Hebizuka> @roll 10#2d6 [18:39] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 6;5;7;5;6;5;4;8;3;3 [18:40] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-6: Miss, Miss, Hit, Miss, Miss, Miss* [18:40] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:40] <MazeBot> [LIMB] Left shoulder [18:40] <&Hebizuka> *Closest equivalent: Left front limb* [18:40] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 7-10: Hit, Miss, Miss, Miss.* [18:41] <&Hebizuka> *Raider is unfortunately able only to place two shots out of the 10 he fired...* [18:41] <&Hebizuka> *One in the torso, one in the arm of the bear.* [18:42] <&Hebizuka> *As you might expect, as useful as 9mm +P is... Against a bear, all of that doesn't matter anymore. Might as well shoot a pea.* [18:43] <&Hebizuka> *It is now your turn. You may roll now.* [18:44] <Jonah> @roll 6#2d6 [18:44] <MazeBot> Jonah: 11;9;5;6;11;7 [18:44] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-6: Hit, Hit, Miss, Miss, Hit, Hit.* [18:45] <&Hebizuka> *The powerful .357 SIG rounds zip at extreme (for a handgun) velocities, sending their 9mm sized pills with much more force than even a 9mm +P would!* [18:45] <&Hebizuka> *And out of the six shots you fired, you landed four in Bear #2 's torso.* [18:46] <&Hebizuka> *Each of your shots punch blood, guts, and life out of the bear, who is finally sent to the bear netherworld.* [18:47] <&Hebizuka> Jonah [Glock 31] Black bear [18:47] <&Hebizuka> [Score] Pistol +1pt [18:47] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's turn...* [18:47] <&Hebizuka> *Her attack against #2 is cancelled. She will only attack Bear #3.* [18:47] <&Hebizuka> @roll 6#2d6 [18:47] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 4;4;6;6;6;8 [18:48] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-6: Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss, Miss, Hit.* [18:48] <&Hebizuka> *Again one hit out of six.* [18:49] <&Hebizuka> *Yet again, it does very little real damage to the ursine!* [18:49] <&Hebizuka> *Except punch out a little more blood.* [18:50] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #2's turn is cancelled - creature is dead.* [18:50] <&Hebizuka> *Bear #3...* [18:50] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:50] <MazeBot> [HEAD] Head [18:50] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:50] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 4 [18:50] <&Hebizuka> *The bear attempted to take a bite from your head, but it isn't nimble enough to even get any close.* [18:50] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako's turn...* [18:50] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [18:50] <MazeBot> [LOWER BODY] Lower body (Hips, pelvis, buttocks) [18:50] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:50] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 12 [18:51] <&Hebizuka> *As if to put a permanent end to this fight, as if to say a cheesy 90s movie line, like "I can't BEAR you anymore", Ayako HULKSMASHES #3's ass, quite literally.* [18:51] <&Hebizuka> *It causes much more damage than it usually would have.* [18:51] <&Hebizuka> *Enough to kill?* [18:52] <&Hebizuka> *The answer is yes.* [18:52] <&Hebizuka> Ayako [Golem punch] Black bear [18:52] <&Hebizuka> *Ally kill!* [18:52] <Jonah> This /entire/ sequence was dumb. [18:52] <Jonah> We're patching you two up and then taking a break. [18:52] <&Hebizuka> *You hear a horrible "CRACK" sound, signaling that Ayako has managed to break the bear's hip bone.* [18:52] <&Hebizuka> *In one punch.* [18:53] <Jonah> And I'm getting you both shotguns because /Christ./ [18:53] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 3...* [18:53] <Jonah> And we still need to take care of the first bear. [18:54] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn bleeds. Bear #1 wakes up, still bleeding and still alive.* [18:54] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 4. Next move?* [18:54] <&Hebizuka> *The last surviving bear is quaking in fear and whining in pain. It looks like it doesn't want to fight anymore.* [18:55] <&Hebizuka> *Will you let the creature go or do you wish to finish it off?* [18:55] <&Hebizuka> [Opinions] Carolyn: Kill it - Raider: Kill it - Ayako: Probably wants to kill it, but you're not sure. [18:57] <Jonah> Let's just leave it alone for now. After I get you patched up, Carolyn, I can give the bear some first aid. [18:57] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] WHAT? No! Let's freaking kill it! [18:58] * Jonah tosses it some crocodile meat from her belt pouch to keep it happy. Or make it puke itself, doesn't really matter. [18:58] <Jonah> It surrendered and it's clearly no threat to us now. [18:58] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] They just tried to MAUL us and you want to give these beasts some mercy?! [18:58] <Jonah> Uhm - yes? That's what a Paladin /does./ [18:59] <&Hebizuka> *The bear is scared by your meat throw, and attempts to flee.* [18:59] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [18:59] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 11 [18:59] <&Hebizuka> *It claws on a door handle, and escapes.* [18:59] <&Hebizuka> *End of fight! (4 turns)* [18:59] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Hehee. He probably thought it was a grenade. [19:00] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Heh-ow... crap. I'm still bleeding. [19:00] <Jonah> Well, that works too. [19:00] <Jonah> And Carolyn, stop moving, you're making it worse. [19:01] * Jonah bends over to her side, and patches her up ASAP with a bandage. [19:01] <Jonah> Has the adrenalin killed the arousal, at least? [19:02] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Only temporarily... I have to admit that when I'm concentrating on something trying to kill me, I'm not thinking about how much I feel like a cheap succubus. [19:02] <&Hebizuka> *5 bandages left. Carolyn is no longer bleeding.* [19:02] <Jonah> I'll have you know that in my world, succubi are never cheap. [19:03] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Yeah well, in mine, succubi deserve death. [19:04] <Jonah> Need anything for the pain? And you too, Raider. I have... er, just the one dose of Oxyocodne, apparently. [19:04] <Jonah> And - wait, really? Succubi deserve death here? That's - that's hilariously harsh. [19:04] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I'm a shrine maiden, dumbass. Of course they do, their very existence is an aberrance and the source of all evil... The only way these beings can atone is by dying. [19:06] <Jonah> ...Okay, see. In my world the policy is to just, uh... [19:06] <Jonah> Kinda - romance them back to the side of Good. [19:06] <Jonah> Demons are fallen angels. No reason they can't climb back up. [19:06] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Ha! Bullshit. They're born evil. [19:09] <Jonah> Nothing's /born/ evil, that's absolutely ridiculous. At /most/ you get a blank slate, and then you just gotta raise it right. [19:09] <Jonah> Like dogs - or bears for that matter. [19:10] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] They're animals, they follow instinct, and they meet their death out of self defense. Demons are different. They're made and taught in hell, where the demon lords forge all evils there are... We aren't demons. Animals don't know any better, and demons act on purpose. [19:16] <Jonah> The location of your birth doesn't have any actual effect on your personality. So either they're born in Hell and brainwashe with bad teachings, and ergo they can be saved... or they're, I dunno, elementals of Pure Evil, in which case they'd just never-endedly assault the world. [19:16] <Jonah> And we know the second isn't true because all demons here, at least, treat their evil as a day job. So - get them better jobs. [19:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] How do YOU know how demons are? [19:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] This isn't even your homeworld! [19:17] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Can you girls stop? We won, let's move. [19:17] <Jonah> Because good and evil are universal concepts. And I told you about Asuna and the demons she stabbed in the back. [19:18] <Jonah> I mean, fuck - that incubus had a /point./ Family's family, and familial love is squarely good. [19:20] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Don't EVER say "fuck" and "that incubus" in the same sentence ever again, or I'll be forced to shoot you. In the penis. [19:21] <Jonah> Go right on ahead, I /still/ need a reason to convince myself to burn money on a cosmetic change. [19:21] <&Hebizuka> *She actually won't.* [19:21] <&Hebizuka> Checkout [19:22] <&Hebizuka> 311 rooms (+11), 37 kills (+3), 0 SEs, 6 missions, 3 Amulets, 4089 P$ (+1112), 0 Runs [19:22] <&Hebizuka> Score: 561pts (+28) [19:22] <&Hebizuka> Position: 3rd (no change) [19:24] <&Hebizuka> =Today's stats= (Legend: Hits/Attempts) [19:24] <&Hebizuka> Shots fired 9/11 [19:24] <&Hebizuka> Nades/rockets 1/1 [19:24] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL: 10/12 (83%) [19:24] <&Hebizuka> =All-time stats= [19:24] <&Hebizuka> Shots fired 63/74 (85%) [19:24] <&Hebizuka> Nades/rockets 2/3 (67%) [19:24] <&Hebizuka> Other 1/1 (100%) [19:24] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL: 66/78 (85% accuracy) [19:25] <&Hebizuka> =Achievements progress= [19:25] <&Hebizuka> Shotgun: 13 pts (+1) - 37 until next badge [19:25] <&Hebizuka> Pistol: 1 pt (+1) - 9 until badge [19:25] <&Hebizuka> Headshot kills: 4 (+1)