Log:Session 64 (Meta, no ontology)
From Mazeworld
[10:46] <&Hebizuka> *Welcome back to the Mazes, Jonah. You have visited 256 rooms, the next special room is at the 270th. You are currently in a perfectly healthy state. Your allies Carolyn, Raider and Ayako all seem A-OK. !mrooms3 to resume.* [10:46] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [10:46] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 6558 - Front door: 7226 - Right door: 4951 - Roomstyle: 143 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [10:47] <Jonah> Mmmm... well, now that I'm done, all that's really left is - figuring out how to /leave/ this Hellhole. And I'll have to transform Ayako back to normal before we do it, too - hope she doesn't hold it against me. [10:47] <~SU_Tempest> *Ayako shifts. You're not sure if she approves or not.* [10:48] * Jonah continues to mutter to herself as she heads through the front door, almost lost in thought. [10:49] <&Hebizuka> *You enter a regular, featureless room. The room is unfortunately inhabited by two strong creatures; a pair of cerberuses.* [10:49] <Jonah> @cover [10:49] <MazeBot> No cover at all! [10:50] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Fantastic. Well, it's time to go all out. [10:50] <Jonah> Well /shit./ Everyone, focus fire! [10:50] <&Hebizuka> *What will you do?* [10:51] <Jonah> Wait no - you two take one, I got the other! [10:51] <Jonah> *Protecta, 3 shots, Left Cereberus's head.* [10:51] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako will bum-rush and hammer the first cerberus, the one you've dubbed as being the left one.* [10:52] <&Hebizuka> *Raider will throw a MkIII grenade at the second (right) one, in an attempt to hurt them both. Carolyn will do the same with her M26.* [10:53] <&Hebizuka> *As for the cerberuses, if they get a chance to attack they will each attempt a firebreath attack; one of them will attack you, the other aims at Carolyn.* [10:54] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: Raider, Carolyn, Jonah, Cerberuses, Ayako.* [10:54] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's turn...* [10:54] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [10:54] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 4 [10:55] <&Hebizuka> *Miss!* [10:55] <&Hebizuka> *The grenade has been thrown too far away and harmlessly explodes in the back of the room.* [10:55] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's turn...* [10:55] <&Hebizuka> @oll 2d6 [10:55] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [10:55] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 11 [10:55] <&Hebizuka> *Direct hit!* [10:55] <Jonah> Why do /only the people I'm working with/ suck at throw- [10:56] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's throw is, on the contrary, so good that it pretty much impact explodes on the second cerberus. The grenade produces fragmentation - 6 shrapnel hit each of the enemy targets.* [10:58] <&Hebizuka> *This is insufficient to kill them both on trauma alone, but they are -severely- hurt, and their bodies badly mangled.* [10:58] <&Hebizuka> *It's now your turn. You may roll now.* [10:58] <Jonah> @roll 3#2d6 [10:58] <MazeBot> Jonah: 7;9;6 [10:59] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-3: Hit (7 pel), Hit (8 pel), Hit (4 pel)* [10:59] <Jonah> *There goes any salvagable meat* Jonah weeps in her heart as the Protecta goes off once, twice, thrice! [10:59] <&Hebizuka> *Total pellets that hit: 19 (3/3 shots)* [11:01] <&Hebizuka> *Your onslaught of buckshot is terrible for an already hurt cerberus. This is more than your target can withstand.* [11:01] <&Hebizuka> Jonah [Protecta] Cerberus [11:04] <&Hebizuka> *Cerberus #1 is dead, turn aborted* [11:04] <&Hebizuka> *Cerberus #2...* [11:04] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:04] <MazeBot> [UPPER BODY] Upper body (Stomach, guts, lower back) [11:04] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [11:04] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 8 [11:05] <&Hebizuka> *The cerberus unleashes its firebreath on Carolyn, who is promptly struck with the attack. Unfortunately her vest is far from fireproof.* [11:06] <Jonah> Fuck fuck /no/ Goddamnit Carolyn I JUST GOT YOU BACK! [11:06] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn has been set on fire, and the slow realization is about to make her scream in pain.* [11:06] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako's attack is aborted, her target is dead.* [11:06] <&Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1, resolving turn-end effects.* [11:06] <Jonah> Raider /take care of this/ I need to help her! [11:08] <&Hebizuka> *The fire spreads, and is starting to damage all of Carolyn's clothes, as well as hurt her faster than she can recover.* [11:08] <&Hebizuka> *Turn 2. What is your next move?* [11:14] * Jonah runs straight for Carolyn as fast as she can, trusting Raider to /do his goddamn job/ and for Ayako to help put the shitheel dog down. She's more focused on grabbing Carolyn and pushing her down as fast as possible to stop, drop, and roll her. [11:15] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn's instinct was already to to the stop, drop and roll, though she isn't saying no to a little help. Both of your turns will end to focus on this.* [11:16] <&Hebizuka> *Raider grabs his shotgun, and starts blasting - two shells at the surviving helldog.* [11:17] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako continues the hulksmash fest on the survivng enemy as well.* [11:17] <&Hebizuka> *As for the cerberus, its attention is focused into attacking the remaining aggressors, and right now, it'd like to burn Ayako up.* [11:17] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: You, Carolyn, Raider, Cerberus, Ayako.* [11:18] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn is spent helping Carolyn to NOT burn up anymore; which in turn means her turn is also spent dropping and rolling.* [11:19] <~SU_Tempest> *Carolyn is screaming in pain, but she is no longer on fire.* [11:19] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's turn...* [11:19] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [11:19] <MazeBot> [UPPER BODY] Upper body (Stomach, guts, lower back) [11:20] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2#2d6 [11:20] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 11;11 [11:20] <&Hebizuka> *Amazingly consistent shooting.* [11:21] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-2: Hit (6 pel), Hit (9 pel)* [11:21] <&Hebizuka> *Total hits: 15 pellets (2/2 shots)* [11:23] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's excellent shooting puts the firedog down before it even has a chance to attack Ayako. Though by doing so, he ruins even more the creature's body and possibly tears up most of the good meat, the cerberus is at least dead.* [11:23] <&Hebizuka> Raider [Ithaca 37 Stakeout] Cerberus [11:23] <&Hebizuka> *End of fight! (2 turns)* [11:24] <Jonah> Carolyn, /Carolyn/ don't go into shock talk to me, where were you hit, where are the burns? [11:24] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] EVERYWHERE. It HURTS. But I'm fine now, I think I'm no longer cooking... [11:26] * Jonah rummages through her backpack asap to pull out the Oxycodone. "I have some pain killers, but they'll make you nauseous. We're not doing too hot on the food front, either, and you just ate." [11:26] <Jonah> Carolyn, do you want to sit here and rest or take the tablet? And either way I'm bandaging you. [11:28] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I'm fine, I'm fine, I don't think I'm bleeding... I could use water though... [11:28] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I'll walk it off, don't worry.. [11:30] <Jonah> Carolyn. You /died./ And the gods can bite me if they think I'm losing you again. [11:30] <Jonah> At least let me check out where you got hit. Please. [11:31] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I think the vest took most of it, Jonah... I'm fine, it's just gonna sting for a while... [11:32] <Jonah> That's... fine. Okay. Just sit down for a sec', okay? Catch your breath? And /stay behind/ me or Ayako the next time we get into a fight. [11:32] * Jonah frets over her for a bit longer before vainly trying to harvest some meat from the dog corpses. [11:32] <&Hebizuka> *Butcher both corpses?* [11:33] <Jonah> *Yup. Two turns to butcher, two turns for Carolyn to heal up a bit.* [11:34] <&Hebizuka> *You butcher the first cerberus. It's so horribly mangled you can only extract very little meat.* [11:35] <&Hebizuka> *You butcher the second cerberus, and it's hardly any better.* [11:36] <&Hebizuka> *Your ICIS identified the meat, and provides a reminder that raw meat isn't all that safe to eat.* [11:36] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Meat - Raw game meat, cerberus - 126+1d126 - 25% Nausea - (Quantity: 4) [11:38] * Jonah stashes it in her pack for now. Raw meat is, as always, better off cooked. Or eaten only in emergencies. [11:38] <Jonah> Raider, thanks for the assist. Need to reload? [11:39] * Jonah hands him two shells regardless, before refilling her own Protecta. [11:39] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Oh, yeah. That's a good idea. [11:39] <&Hebizuka> *Pass Raider 2 shells of what type?* [11:40] <Jonah> *Buckshot. I'll refill the Protecta with buckshot as well.* [11:40] <&Hebizuka> *Passed 2x 12 gauge buck to Raider. 86 remaining in backpack.* [11:41] <&Hebizuka> *He promptly refills his tube with them.* [11:41] <&Hebizuka> [Reload] Armsel Protecta - +3x Buck, weapon now at [12/12, 12x Buck] [11:41] <&Hebizuka> *12 gauge buckshot remaining in backpack: 83* [11:42] <Jonah> ...I need to rename this shotgun. It's too useful. [11:42] <Jonah> Carolyn - are you okay, dearest? Ready to go? [11:42] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [11:42] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 1679 - Front door: 5008 - Right door: 5258 - Roomstyle: 407 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [11:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Yes, thanks. I'll be all right, don't worry. [11:44] <Jonah> That's like asking the sun to not shine. Or for you to accept my advances. [11:44] * Jonah smiles to take the sting out of the self-deprecation, before ushering them through the front door. [11:49] <&Hebizuka> *A washitsu. You spot here the usual furniture ; heated table, futon, small TV (@whatsonTV), radio (@radio), but you also see a container as well as an accessory, both on the floor.* [11:50] <Jonah> Any of you three want to nap? That futon looks comfy. [11:50] <Jonah> @whatsonTV [11:50] <MazeBot> [Reality show] MasterSergeantChef: Cuisine with Guns [11:51] <&Hebizuka> *Watch?* [11:51] * Jonah shuts the TV off. [11:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I am pretty far from tired. [11:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I hate to make bad puns but that fight got me fired up. I could go on for hours. [11:51] <~SU_Tempest> *Carolyn gives him the deathglare.* [11:51] <Jonah> Being set on fire /would/ get your blood pump - ugh. [11:51] * Jonah glares with her. [11:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I'm SORRY. [11:51] <Jonah> *Ayako, if you can read my mind, GLARE TOO.* [11:52] <~SU_Tempest> *Ayako doesn't care.* [11:52] <Jonah> @radio [11:52] <MazeBot> [Other/Unique] Soundwave 108.1 with DJ P-RAT and his Treasure Chest of Unique Songs - http://bit.ly/1879YBk [11:52] <&Hebizuka> *Current song: Scarface - Push It to the Limit.* [11:53] <Jonah> Eh. [11:53] * Jonah heads over to the container, giving it a quick once-over for traps and other terrible things. [11:53] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider seems annoyed by the song. He switches stations.* [11:53] <&Hebizuka> @radio [11:53] <MazeBot> [Hard rock/Metal] Vulture Radio with DJ T-Zero - http://bit.ly/1awLBN9 [11:53] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] That's more like it. [11:53] <&Hebizuka> *Current song: Metallica - Enter Sandman* [11:54] <Jonah> More like a blistering headache. /Gunshots/ cause less ringing in the ears. [11:54] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Hey, fuck you. [11:54] <~SU_Tempest> *His sentence is so unconvincing you -know- he didn't even mean it seriously.* [11:55] <&Hebizuka> [Container] Frame: Wooden - Lock: Mechanical - Serial: 0809 - Trapped: Yes [11:55] <Jonah> ...Hmmmmmmm. [11:55] <Jonah> @cover [11:55] <MazeBot> A metallic container (Health: 40, LDV modifier: -3. AC Eqv: Kevlar-3. Pass-through threshold: 10+ dmg. Pain modifier: x0.50) [11:55] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako sits in the corner, coincidentally behind the cover - and breaking the heated table in the process.* [11:56] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Trapped box, Jonah? [11:56] <Jonah> Yuh-huh. I'm thinking of just shooting it, triggering the trap, and then lockpicking it. [11:57] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn and Raider both huddle up behind the metallic container - which is empty, in order to let you shoot the wooden container - which may contain things.* [11:59] * Jonah quickly joins them - then realizes she doesn't actually have anything on her besides the Protecta and the Dragonbane. [11:59] <Jonah> Uhm - well. Raider, can you do the honors? Buckshot seems overkill. [11:59] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] You want me to shoot it with my handgun? [12:01] <Jonah> Yeah. Just one round at a time, until the trap triggers. [12:01] <&Hebizuka> *Raider takes aim with his M9, and tries to hit the lock.* [12:01] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [12:01] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 5 [12:02] <&Hebizuka> *He misses, and his slide locks back. His weapon is now empty.* [12:02] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] ...That's awkward. [12:02] <Jonah> Wait, you were /empty?/ Crap. [12:03] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Looks like it. Just let me fix that. [12:03] <Jonah> Uh, that's. Dang - Carolyn, do you want to try? [12:03] <Jonah> Oh, okay. Nevermind. [12:03] <&Hebizuka> *Raider quickly swaps magazines, switching to a fresh, full one.* [12:03] <Jonah> Better we find out now instead of later. [12:04] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Damn right. Okay, let's do this again. [12:04] <&Hebizuka> *He attempts one shot, again.* [12:04] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [12:04] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 8 [12:05] <&Hebizuka> *The bullet strikes the lock, damaging it slightly, but also triggering the trap. You hear rapid beeping, similar to a bomb about to activate!* [12:05] <&Hebizuka> *WHAMMM. A violent explosion rocks the entire room - the container has been entirely destroyed!* [12:05] <Jonah> Oh /thank god/ we're behind cover. [12:06] <&Hebizuka> *Gone is the loot, and pretty much everything related to the container. The radio has been toppled and sent crashing on the floor, shutting off the vocals of the current song permanently. Even the television set has been disturbed.* [12:06] <&Hebizuka> *Thankfully everyone is safe, as the explosion did not occur on your side.* [12:07] <Jonah> Well. At least I didn't die. Let's see if that accessory is still there - I think it got blown about by the blast... [12:08] <&Hebizuka> *The accessory is fine, it just got sent across the room, but harmlessly landed on the futon.* [12:08] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Silencer: 9x18mm Makarov [12:09] <Jonah> If anyone has a Makarov, tell me now or forever hold your piece. [12:09] * Jonah begins to stick it in her fancy beltpouch in the meantime! [12:10] <~SU_Tempest> *No-one carries any compatible weapon.* [12:10] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [12:10] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 783 - Front door: 2359 - Right door: 1071 - Roomstyle: 534 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [12:10] <Jonah> Let's get going before we get arrested! Front door! [12:10] <&Hebizuka> *Place it in Belt/Main?* [12:10] <Jonah> *Belt/Main, yes.* [12:10] <&Hebizuka> *Sorry, Belt/Main is full. [3/3]* [12:11] <&Hebizuka> *Left leg rig has space [2/4] though. As well as Tacvest/Main [5.2/7], or of course your backpack [58.34/60].* [12:12] <Jonah> *Left leg rig. then!* [12:13] <&Hebizuka> [Left rig] 3/4 [12:14] <&Hebizuka> *You make it inside an office, with its four computers, printer, and office clutter. You spot some loose ammo on one of the desks.* [12:15] * Jonah hums, glancing over the loose ammo, before once again searching for passwords and the like. [12:15] <&Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 5.7x28mm, FMJ, 15 rounds - Weight: 0.15 [12:15] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn sees that, and pockets them.* [12:16] <&Hebizuka> *PC #2 has a post-it note. Read?* [12:16] <Jonah> *Yup yup.* [12:17] <&Hebizuka> [Note] "Hey, what's up Jackie? Here's your login info for this week. LOGIN: jfowler PASS: eErm46h3rd" [12:18] <Jonah> How do people do this /all the time?/ [12:18] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] "Jackie Fowler"? Geez, that kid must've not had a tender childhood with a name like that. [12:19] <&Hebizuka> *Access the computer? It's currently turned on, but idle.* [12:19] <Jonah> Well, if it was a girl she was probably fine. [12:19] * Jonah sits her ass down and shamelessly logs herself in. [12:20] <&Hebizuka> [Computer] "Welcome back, Jack Fowler." [12:20] <&Hebizuka> *There is a MazeNet access, a weird program called "alienstorm272.exe" and a folder named "AS".* [12:21] <Jonah> Let's look at the folder first. [12:22] <Jonah> Taking bets on what 'Alienstorm272.exe' will do. My money's on a bad video game. [12:22] <&Hebizuka> *You see "alienstorm272.exe" once again, but also various files with uncanny file extensions - presumably the uncompiled form of what appears to be a video game.* [12:24] <Jonah> Executable it is. Click. [12:26] <&Hebizuka> *You are treated to the splash screen of the beta version of a video game called Alien Storm. It appears to be some sort of shoot'em up, and all the aliens appear to be nightmarish food-themed creatures. You can spend some time playing it (will count as waiting), or close that and browse something else.* [12:27] <&Hebizuka> *The developers are credited as being "AE1". You notice the desktop background was a stylized logo which depicted the name "AE1" ; it looks like you are in their development offices.* [12:28] * Jonah sighs. If she was alone, she'd absolutely play the hell out of this. But as things go... [12:28] <Jonah> Unless any of you want to play, we should probably go. [12:28] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [12:28] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 1616 - Front door: 655 - Right door: 865 - Roomstyle: 183 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [12:28] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] No thanks. [12:28] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Alien Storm! Oh man, so that's what AE1 was working on huh? [12:28] <Jonah> Wait, Carolyn, you know this company? [12:29] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] ...What? Yes, I used to play a lot of video games. I -love- AE1's stuff, they almost always make shmups or beat'em ups. It's less a company and really just a team of programmers. [12:29] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Decidedly, less and less things surprise me. [12:30] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Hey, I'll tell you all about the average day as a shrine maiden: it's boring as shit! I bought a PC and a few of their games with donation cash to pass the time when there was nothing to do. [12:31] <Jonah> Hmm hmm~ Carolyn, why don't you show me your moves? I've never played a shoot'em up before. [12:31] <&Hebizuka> *Watch Carolyn play?* [12:31] <Jonah> *Absolutely!* [12:32] <&Hebizuka> *Please roll a 2d6.* [12:32] <Jonah> @roll 2d6 [12:32] <MazeBot> Jonah: 12 [12:34] <&Hebizuka> *You watch Carolyn treating the game's hardest difficulty setting as a -complete breeze-, dodging and destroying the various food aliens and clearing the first few levels like it's nothing. Five turns pass as the miminalist soundtracks and explosion sound effects are heard... and someone enters the room.* [12:35] <Jonah> Holy shit Carolyn you're /amazing./ This is - gah! [12:35] * Jonah quickly turns around to face the newcomer, keeping Carolyn behind her in the process. [12:36] <&Hebizuka> *A Citizen, carrying a shoulder bag and a pistol, enters the room. They notice all of you immediately. Especially Ayako.* [12:36] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] What the fuck?! [12:37] <Jonah> Wait it's okay she's tame! [12:38] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Duuuude. A pet golem?! [12:38] <Jonah> "Ayako, raise your hand and say hi!" Jonah continues to motormouth in the hopes that Ayako won't see this dude as a thre- oh god he's totally high isn't he. [12:38] <&Hebizuka> *The citizen appears to be x-female, and seems, despite the uncanny sight, rather sociable.* [12:38] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako does say hi.* [12:39] * Jonah takes a better look at the other woman now that things have calmed down - and Carolyn's still totally engrossed in the game isn't she. [12:40] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] Okay um, guys, the pet golem is fun and all, but can you please tell me what the hell you are doing playing my unreleased game? [12:41] <Jonah> Oh - oh! Are you miss Jackie Fowler? [12:41] <&Hebizuka> *An adult, asian x-female. She is small, obese, has shoulder-length auburn hair, blue-green eyes, wears brass earrings, and has an unseen wound on the leg.* [12:42] <&Hebizuka> *You estimate her to be in her thirties, and her cup size to be EE, at the very least.* [12:43] <~SU_Tempest> [Citizen] No, I'm not. Jack is a dude. I'm his boss, Bernice Riddick. [12:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Oh shit! Bernice Riddick? The real Bernice Riddick? [12:44] <Jonah> Well, you see - we kinda got lost and stumbled in here. Our curiosity got the better of us, and since your friend left the note about your - that is, since someone left your employee's password here, we kinda... helped ourselves. [12:44] <Jonah> And as you can see Carolyn's a huge fan! She couldn't resist at all. [12:45] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Jonah! You're talking to the owner of AE1! [12:45] <Jonah> I kinda figured! She /did/ say she was the boss of a programmer. [12:46] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] That's right. Well, whatever you guys are doing here, please don't talk about that new version of Alien Storm, alright? It's going to hit the shelves soon, but, well, if you've played the old version too... you probably noticed the upgraded graphics. It's largely not finished yet, though. [12:46] <Jonah> "And, uhm - we'll definitely be buying Alien Storm as soon as it's released?" Jonah flashes Bernice a sheepish and apologetic smile, desperately hopng they're not about to be killed for corporate espionage. [12:47] <Jonah> Oh, absolutely. Talking about it would just hurt your profits. We'd definitely prefer if you guys stayed afloat. [12:47] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] We're going to sell the new copies for cheaper to all customers who bring proof of purchase of the old version, a brand new business method which we hope is going to get us more sales. And, sure. I'll give you guys a copy for free if you keep the secret. Just give me er, one of you give me your address? I'll have one shipped. [12:47] <Jonah> I'll. Hmmmmm... [12:48] <Jonah> Raider, can we use your address? [12:48] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I don't have one. I'm a merc, always on the move. [12:49] <Jonah> Well, nuts. That makes three of us. [12:49] <Jonah> I... don't suppose you have a phone we could call, Bernice? Carolyn would /love/ a copy, but we're currently between homes at the moment. [12:49] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] All of you guys are adventurers or something? That's pretty cool. Too bad we don't specialize in RPGs or platformers, I'd have loved to commission a game about a ragtag team of raiders. [12:50] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] *Snort* [12:50] <Jonah> *Pfft* [12:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Well, if that's not too much to ask, could you send it to a bank and have it deposited to a vault in my name? Carolyn Knight. [12:51] <Jonah> Yeah, we're adventuring at the moment. Not sure where we're adventuring too, but it's the journey that matters, right? [12:51] <Jonah> ...Banks have /storage boxes?/ [12:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] Sure thing. [12:51] <Jonah> That's - when did that happen? [12:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] You didn't know? Banks always had a vaulting service. [12:51] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Free and without maintenance costs too. [12:51] <Jonah> Oh my god I'm going to take advantage of that /so hard./ [12:52] <Jonah> Carolyn, you are never /not/ the best. I love you. [12:53] <~SU_Tempest> *The former shrine maiden blushes red. Bernice chuckles.* [12:54] <Jonah> And - as for making a game about a ragtag team of raiders... couldn't you make a fighting game about that? Each character knows different kinds of martial arts or uses a different weapon, and then you can mae the bad guys, like, mafiosos. [12:54] <Jonah> Brawlers still had character stry modes, last time I checked. [12:56] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] Well, that's not really our turf. Fighting games are what another team do best, you may want to ask the Fighting Vision team for that. They're good at it, I know them well. [12:58] <Jonah> Hahah. That /does/ sound a bit fun. Carolyn, if you'd like - maybe we could ask for a meetup or something? [12:59] * Jonah hasn't seen Carolyn so cheery in forever. Anything to keep that going is worthwhile in her book. [12:59] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I'll admit to you I'm not a fan of fighting games, though. [12:59] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] That's great too, that means you're a customer for us and not for them. *chuckle* [13:00] * Jonah just giggles and sighs. "And here I figured you'd like to be immortalized in video game form." [13:01] <Jonah> Miss Bernice, thank you so much for making Carolyn's day. She - really needed it. Is there anything we can do to help you, besides keeping Alien Storm a secret?" [13:01] <Jonah> You seemed interested in Ayako - I dunno, if you're not too busy, maybe we could do a bit of storytelling or something. [13:02] <~SU_Tempest> [Bernice] Well, I don't wanna be a stickler, but I need to log on and start working. I don't think Jack or any of my other teammates will stay cool in front of your pet golem as much as I do, though. I'm always told, "Bernie, you never get angry at anything". It's true! But yes, as I was saying... I gotta work, so I'll ask you to leave, I'm real sorry. [13:02] <Jonah> Oh, no, not at all! We've taken up too much of your time already. [13:03] <Jonah> Best of luck with your business, Miss! It's been a complete pleasure. [13:03] <~SU_Tempest> *She does a military salute, smiling bright. Carolyn is beaming.* [13:03] <~SU_Tempest> *Raider mostly doesn't seem to care much, but it's par for the course.* [13:04] * Jonah salutes right back, and gives Carolyn a moment to say her goodbyes before the four of them head out the front door. [13:12] <&Hebizuka> *Moving on. Roomstyle: 183, room number: 655...* [13:14] <&Hebizuka> *A warehouse room. An undelivered shipment of weapons is sitting there, in a crate, as though it has been forgotten. Oh, the delicious loot.* [13:15] * Jonah had been hugging Carolyn the entire time between rooms, just basking in her happiness. Her own mood is a lot lighter now as she heads to get her some CRATES. [13:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] You two are such lovebirds. [13:17] <~SU_Tempest> *Deadpan* [13:18] <Jonah> Didn't you hear her earlier, Raider? She's my Knight. Of course I love her. [13:20] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Psh. [13:20] <&Hebizuka> =Weapons shipment= [13:20] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 1 - ZiD Fedorov Avtomat battle rifle | 6.5x50mm SR Arisaka - Semi/Full | Foregrip(I) | Avtomat 25-round mag, +1 | Weight: 22 - [24+1/25, 25x AP] - Cond: 100% (Perfect) / Clns: 100% (Perfect) [13:20] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 1 - Remington Model 700 BDL sniper rifle | .30-06 Springfield - Bolt-action | Bipod | Internal magazine, 4 rounds, no +1 | Weight: 22 - [4/4, 4x FMJ] - Cond: 100% (Perfect) / Clns: 100% (Perfect) [13:20] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 2 - Springfield M79 grenade launcher | 40mm NATO grenade - Single shot | No accessory | Capacity: 1 | Weight: 5 - [Loaded, M386 HE] - Cond: 100% (Perfect) / Clns: 100% (Perfect) [13:22] <Jonah> Oh lordy we hit the /jackpot./ [13:22] <Jonah> Can we carry all of these? Oh, tell me we can carry all of these - I can carry one of the rifles, at least. [13:23] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Hey, I already have an M79. I could just unload the grenade. For the rest... I can equip one of those rifles... [13:25] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn proceeds to extract the grenade.* [13:25] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Hmm. Jonah. Do you carry any .30-06 or 6.5mm Arisaka? [13:25] <Jonah> I was thinking we could carry both - sell one to a gun shop or trade it in for something. [13:27] <Jonah> I don't /think/ so... let me rummage through my stuff for a bit. [13:28] <Jonah> Why do you ask? [13:28] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Well, because those two rifles use that. If you have ammo, you could let Carolyn carry the relevant rifle along with it. [13:30] <Jonah> Uh - wait, aren't you carrying a box of the .30-06 stuff? [13:30] <Jonah> A little before we found the cyclops - or was it after? [13:30] <&Hebizuka> *Raider pauses, and searches. He finds 17 rounds of .30-06 hollow-points.* [13:31] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Search in yours too. I'm confident you have more. [13:32] * Jonah frowns, then starts digging through herself to double check. Shells, more shells, /more/ shells... "If I had them I must have a hole in my bag; I don't see them now. [13:32] <Jonah> " [13:35] <Jonah> Oh - wait, they were buried under the maid suit. I'm a dumb bitch. [13:35] * Jonah pulls out 20 shiny rounds of sniper rifle bullets. Yay! [13:35] <Jonah> Thought of a name for your guns yet, Carolyn? [13:35] <~SU_Tempest> *Carolyn will be taking the Remington 700 BDL, as well as your and Raider's ammo.* [13:36] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] That solves the problem of finding ammo for it. Uhh, names? No, not really. [13:36] <Jonah> Mmmm. Well, I've been thinking. [13:37] * Jonah takes the battle rifle and stashes it in the meantime, almost breathing easier now that she has a spare weapon. [13:37] <Jonah> I need to name the Protecta. And it would get terribly confusing if I named her after you or Ayako. So... [13:38] <Jonah> How does Christine Daae sound to you? [13:39] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Ridiculous. No chance. [13:40] <Jonah> Awww, why not? I love it when she sings! [13:40] * Jonah has the biggest shit eating grin as she says this, almost anticipating Carolyn's reaction. [13:40] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] What kind of name is that? That sounds like crap. [13:41] <Jonah> How - how do you not know Christine Daae, she's fam - oh. [13:41] <Jonah> Right. I forget sometimes. [13:42] * Jonah takes a quick breath to center herself and get some composure back. "When I bring you home, we're going to the opera. That's a promise." [13:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Otherworld celebrities, huh? *smug grin* [13:42] * Jonah can only sheeplessly smile. "Yuh-huh. I had a crush on her before I met you." [13:42] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 57.34/60 [13:42] <&Hebizuka> *Cannot spare the Fedorov Avtomat - not enough space.* [13:43] <Jonah> ...Nuts. Carolyn, Raider, can either of you spare this? It's probably worth more than the grenade launcher. [13:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] No dice, sorry. [13:44] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I maybe can but it's gonna be taking a lot of space... [13:45] <Jonah> We can always drop it later if we need the space for something important. Could you, Carolyn? Just like old times~? [13:46] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Well okay. [13:46] <&Hebizuka> *She hefts the Avtomat, and shoves it as much as she can in her bag. It sticks out, but it works.* [13:47] <Jonah> Let me know if it's too heavy for you, okay? We can dump it if you're uncomfortable. [13:47] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [13:47] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 377 - Front door: 473 - Right door: 672 - Roomstyle: 534 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [13:47] * Jonah kisses Carolyn's cheek in thanks, before heading through the front door. Let's see how she reacts to my affections~ [13:48] <&Hebizuka> *By blushing some more.* [13:49] * Jonah starts blushing as well, and simply can't resist the urge to hold Carolyn's hand as they walk. [13:49] <&Hebizuka> *A regular, featureless room. There is a shiny on the floor... [13:50] <Jonah> Ooooh. More wealth, more~ [13:50] * Jonah 's dragon hoarding instincts take over as she scoops the shiny up. [13:50] <&Hebizuka> *The ICIS identified it for you.* [13:50] <&Hebizuka> [Valuable] Brown gem - Worthless glass - Value 3-6 P$ (1d4 +2) - Weight: 0.1 [13:51] <Jonah> Nuts. [13:51] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [13:51] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 668 - Front door: 3407 - Right door: 5979 - Roomstyle: 12 - Enemy strength: 2 /6 [13:51] <Jonah> Let's keep going. Front door. [13:55] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] I feel a lot better now. It doesn't hurt anymore! [13:57] <Jonah> Hooray~! [14:02] <&Hebizuka> *A grassy room. The room is currently occupied by an Aer Dragon, who laments the fact that he is not a herbivore and doesn't care for grass, only for meat. [14:15] <Jonah> @cover [14:15] <MazeBot> A flipped thin metal table. (Health: 32, LDV modifier: -1. AC Eqv: Kevlar-2. Pass-through threshold: 8+ dmg. Pain modifier: x1) [14:15] <Jonah> Ohhhh, this is gonna suck. [14:15] * Jonah doesn't bother with cover at all, simply choosing to bring the Protecta out. [14:16] <Jonah> Oh wait no, I have a gun /specifically called Dragonbane/ what am I doing. [14:19] <&Hebizuka> *What will you do, then?* [14:19] <Jonah> *Dragonbane, 1 shot, Aer dragon, scope and bipod* [14:23] <&Hebizuka> *The Aer Dragon wants to fuck your shit up and will attempt an airblast attack at you.* [14:24] <&Hebizuka> *Raider loses no time, aims his ARX-160 and fires five shots in full-auto.* [14:24] <&Hebizuka> *Though not without forgetting to turn the laser sight on!* [14:25] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn will test her new Remington out. She plops down on the ground, deploys the bipod, and gets ready to fire twice at the dragon.* [14:25] <&Hebizuka> *Ayako will try to hulksmash the draconic creature, as golems always do.* [14:27] <&Hebizuka> *You are as fast as Raider. Do you want to go before or after him?* [14:28] <Jonah> *Before. No sense wasting bullets.* [14:29] <&Hebizuka> *Order this turn: Dragon, You, Raider, Ayako, Carolyn.* [14:31] <&Hebizuka> *Aer Dragon...* [14:31] <&Hebizuka> @bodyaim [14:31] <MazeBot> [LOWER BODY] Lower body (Hips, pelvis, buttocks) [14:31] <&Hebizuka> @roll 2d6 [14:31] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 9 [14:32] <&Hebizuka> *Concentrated beam made of aer magic. Or in other words, ridiculously lethal air. The dragon's mouth-fired beam hit you in the pelvis, right where your body armor does NOT protect you.* [14:32] <&Hebizuka> *Not that it would have mattered.* [14:35] <&Hebizuka> *Your military pants sustain damage - enough that their condition drops to Worn. And you too, you sustain damage; a significant amount of pain and a certain amount of damage. You're far from dead, but that hurt.* [14:36] <&Hebizuka> *Your turn. You may roll now.* [14:37] <Jonah> HOLY FUCK AIR SHOULD NOT HURT THAT MUCH! [14:37] <Jonah> @roll 2d6 [14:37] <MazeBot> Jonah: 4 [14:38] <&Hebizuka> *Shot 1: Miss.* [14:38] <&Hebizuka> *And that's not even by much!* [14:41] <&Hebizuka> *Raider's turn...* [14:41] <&Hebizuka> @roll 5#2d6 [14:41] <MazeBot> Hebizuka: 7;7;2;9;10 [14:41] <&Hebizuka> *No failure.* [14:42] <&Hebizuka> *Shots 1-5: Hit, Hit, Miss, Hit, Hit.* [14:43] <&Hebizuka> *It seems that Raider has hit the nail!* [14:43] <&Hebizuka> Raider [ARX-160] Aer Dragon [14:43] <&Hebizuka> *End of fight! (1 turn)* [14:44] <Jonah> Oh jesus /fuck/ my hips. Raider, /Raider,/ why does getting my penis blasted with air hurt so much. [14:45] <Jonah> Like, what the fuck, how are you guys considered the stronger gender when you have this much of a glaring weakpoint, owwwwww. [14:45] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] You weren't hit in the dick. You were hit in the pelvis, which is where you're going to clutch if you ever get a kick in the balls. [14:45] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] The stronger gender? Is that a thing from your world? [14:47] <Jonah> Yuh - yuh huh. Four genders isn't a /thing/ where I'm from. Just dudes and girls. Having a 'holy sword' - ow fuckit hurts to breathe - where it doesn't belong is the mark of a pervert. [14:48] * Jonah doesn't want to risk it at all, and promptly busts out a first aid kit to use on her pelvis. [14:51] <&Hebizuka> *You break out an FAK on your hips, treating the damage you received there. You're starting to heal.* [14:52] <Jonah> Okay, now. [14:52] <Jonah> Ladies, gent, we are going to /eat some fucking dragon./ [14:53] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I took the cerberus meat, by the way. [14:54] <Jonah> Oh - oh, goody. Thanks for that, I had... kinda forgotten completely. [14:56] <&Hebizuka> *Butcher the dragon?* [14:58] <Jonah> *Butcher the fuck out of it.* [14:59] <&Hebizuka> *You spend some time easily tearing the carcass into nice, tender, bloody chunks of delicious dragon meat...* [15:01] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Meat - Raw game meat, aer dragon - 126+1d126 - 25% Nausea, Strength+20% for 2 turns - weight 1/item - (Quantity: 70) [15:01] <Jonah> ...holy /fuck/ that's a lot of meat. [15:02] <Jonah> That's, uh... do either of you have a way to make fire? [15:04] <~SU_Tempest> *They both shake heads.* [15:04] <Jonah> Figures. This is... hmmm. [15:07] <Jonah> I'm trying to figure out what's worth more, the battle rifle or 22 pieces of dragon meat. [15:10] <Jonah> Well - alright. Carolyn, could you leave the rifle here, and stuff your backpack with the meat? [15:10] <Jonah> Raider, you and I need to fill up too, as much as possible. [15:10] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Roger that. [15:10] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Got it [15:11] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn drops the Fedorov and starts packing all dat meat.* [15:11] <Jonah> *Yeah, stick that thick, juicy meat in there, Carolyn. Get it /all.*/ [15:11] <&Hebizuka> *Lewd!* [15:12] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn has been able to take 24 pieces. 46 left on the floor.* [15:12] <Jonah> Carloyn, do you mind if I have that hamburger now? I'm feeling a bit peckish, but I don't want to eat raw meat. [15:12] <&Hebizuka> *Raider has been able to shove 20 in his pack. 26 left.* [15:25] * Jonah stares at the leftover meat, almost weeping at the loss. She's so sad about the waste, in fact, that she up and takes three pieces of meat to swallow down. [15:26] <&Hebizuka> *You gulp down three pieces of raw dragon meat. It's very filling, nutritious, and on top of that, it makes you feel stronger, a lot stronger!* [15:27] <&Hebizuka> *However ,one of those must have been bad, because you are starting to feel nauseous.* [15:27] <Jonah> Nghhh - that's what I thought would happen. [15:28] * Jonah slips a piece of dragon meat into her leg rig, another in her vest, and two more in her backpack. Afterwards, she sits down to wait out the nausea, closing her eyes and groaning softly. [15:28] <Jonah> Guhhh. Uhhhh - stay away, I think I might puke. [15:30] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Oh geez. We shouldn't be eating this raw. [15:30] <&Hebizuka> *23 pieces of raw meat left on the floor.* [15:31] <Jonah> Desperate times call for desperate measures. Ngh. [15:31] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:31] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 6182 - Front door: 5869 - Right door: 5644 - Roomstyle: 55 - Enemy strength: 3 /6 [15:31] <Jonah> Let's - let's just go, I... I guess. [15:31] <Jonah> Front door. [15:31] <Jonah> Oh god this was /so dumb./ [15:33] <&Hebizuka> *You are starting to recuperate from your limb damage. Your nauseous sensation isn't nice, but you are toughing it out so far.* [15:35] <&Hebizuka> *You make it inside a storage area. There is a container here, an object on the floor, as well as a weapon.* [15:36] <Jonah> Ngh. /More/ weapons...? [15:36] * Jonah takes a look at both the weapon and the container. [15:37] <&Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 5 Short: Kizlyar DV-2 knife - Sharp/Piercing - Butchering. Weight: 3 [15:38] <&Hebizuka> [Container] Frame: Wooden - Lock: Electronic - Serial: 5622 - Trapped: Yes [15:39] <Jonah> Either of you want the knife? [15:39] * Jonah leaves the container well enough alone - no sense dealing with a /trapped/ one. [15:41] <Jonah> Carolyn? Raider? Knifey knifey? [15:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I have one like that already. [15:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] No thanks! [15:41] <Jonah> Alrighty, then. [15:41] * Jonah takes a breath to steady herself as she [15:41] <Jonah> !mrooms3 [15:41] <&Hebizuka> [ Jonah ] Left door: 5762 - Front door: 7257 - Right door: 902 - Roomstyle: 268 - Enemy strength: 2 /6 [15:41] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Hey, what's that? [15:41] <Jonah> Hngh? What's what? [15:42] <&Hebizuka> [Key item] A key. Serial number: 5622 [15:42] <~SU_Tempest> *Carolyn leers at you with a smug grin.* [15:42] * Jonah is just a bit too focused on the unending stomach ache from - jesus christ what. [15:42] * Jonah stares back, before blushing and turning away like a fair maiden. [15:42] <Jonah> M'sorry. [15:42] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Just open that thing up, silly. [15:42] <Jonah> Wanna do the honors, Carolyn? [15:42] <Jonah> Oh - okay. [15:43] <&Hebizuka> *Key added to the keyring. Total carried: 2.* [15:43] * Jonah takes the key from Carolyn's outstretched hand, before opening the container. [15:43] <&Hebizuka> *You open the container, disengaging the electronic lock and the trap.* [15:44] <Jonah> *what kind of trap was it?* [15:44] <&Hebizuka> =Container contents= [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Bottle of mineral water. 0kcal - 50% Suppressed hunger, 2d2 turns. [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Bottle of mineral water. 0kcal - 50% Suppressed hunger, 2d2 turns. [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Bottle of mineral water. 0kcal - 50% Suppressed hunger, 2d2 turns. [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Can of orange juice. 160kcal [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Can of orange juice. 160kcal [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Can of lemonade. 90kcal - Strength+10%, Alertness increase for 6 turns [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Bottle of brandy. 1404kcal - Inebriation +3d10+2 [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Bottle of brandy. 1404kcal - Inebriation +3d10+2 [15:44] <&Hebizuka> > [Food] Beverage - Bottle of brandy. 1404kcal - Inebriation +3d10+2 [15:45] <&Hebizuka> *You may never know what the trap was, now!* [16:14] <Jonah> That's... that's a /lotta/ drinks. [16:14] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] I wouldn't consider anything here but the water to be valuable, if you want my opinion. [16:15] <Jonah> That's a good point, but brandy... [16:15] <Jonah> Carolyn, come over here! It's time to drink up! [16:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] What? Hell no, I don't wanna end up in a drunken stupor! I know what dying feels like now. [16:16] <Jonah> Wait what? No, I meant the orange juice! And lemonade! [16:16] <Jonah> We're keeping the brandy for a special occasion. Light sips! [16:16] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] ...you did just say brandy though. Bah. Orange and lemonade time? [16:17] <~SU_Tempest> [Raider] Fine, I'm on the water... [16:17] <&Hebizuka> *Raider shoves the three bottles in his vest.* [16:18] <&Hebizuka> *What will you drink and what will you give to Carolyn?* [16:20] * Jonah takes one of the orange juices, leaving Carolyn and Raider to go through the other juice and lemonade. [16:20] <Jonah> Ans, for the brandy... [16:21] <&Hebizuka> *You drink the can of orange juice. It's surprisingly fresh, and very tasty.* [16:21] <&Hebizuka> *Carolyn downs the orange juice remaining, as well as the lemonade.* [16:22] * Jonah keeps two bottles of brandy in her backpack, and... hmmm - straps the last one to her leg rig! [16:22] <Jonah> Tasty, honey? [16:22] <&Hebizuka> [Pack/Main] 58.34/60 [16:23] <&Hebizuka> [Left rig] 4/4 [16:23] <~SU_Tempest> [Carolyn] Yup! Thanks. [16:24] <Jonah> Hehehe. [16:24] <&Hebizuka> *Onwards to the next room... Style: 268, number: 7257* [16:25] * Jonah , now suitably refreshed, links arms with Carolyn before heading through the front door. [16:25] <&Hebizuka> *Hips healing has ceased, it looks like you're back to fully healthy. (2 damage healed). You are still feeling nauseous, but no catastrophe has occurred yet.* [16:26] <&Hebizuka> *A messy, featureless room, stained with dried blood. You see a can on the floor...* [16:27] * Jonah goes over to the can, giving it a scan! [16:27] <&Hebizuka> [Food] Canned goods - Carrots, canned, 700g. 161kcal - Weight: 2 [16:30] <&Hebizuka> *Take it?* [16:46] <Jonah> *Yes please!* [16:50] <&Hebizuka> Checkout [16:52] <&Hebizuka> 264 rooms (+9), 30 kills (+3), 0 SEs, 5 missions, 3 Amulets, 2312 P$, 0 runs [16:52] <&Hebizuka> Score: 472pts (+14) [16:52] <&Hebizuka> Pos: 3rd [16:53] <&Hebizuka> =Today's stats= (Legend: Hits/Attempts) [16:53] <&Hebizuka> Shots fired 3/4 [16:53] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL 3/4 (75%) [16:53] <&Hebizuka> =All-time stats= [16:53] <&Hebizuka> Shots fired 49/58 (84%) [16:53] <&Hebizuka> Nades and rockets 1/2 (50%) [16:53] <&Hebizuka> Special/Other 1/1 (100%) [16:53] <&Hebizuka> TOTAL 51/61 (84% accuracy) [16:54] <&Hebizuka> =Achiemevents progress= [16:54] <&Hebizuka> Shotgun kills: 12 (+1), 38 until Silver badge [16:54] <&Hebizuka> *That's it for now.*