Log:Game 153 (Meta, no ontology)

[13:42] <~Hebizuka> Welcome back to MzW, Eris Lilium. You have visited 58 rooms during this second run (and a total of 506 overall). No special condition to report, apart from the fact your pain sensitivity is still negated. Next special room at the 60th (MazeSlots). Type !mrooms3 to continue. [13:43] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [13:43] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 3339 - Front door: 833 - Right door: 2769 - Roomstyle: 136 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [13:43] * %Eris` left door [13:44] <~Hebizuka> *A warehouse room. There isn't much that looks interesting here, other than a small box of ammo.* [13:44] <~Hebizuka> *There's also only one door here.* [13:46] * %Eris` checks out the ammo [13:46] <~Hebizuka> [Ammunition] Nailgun roll of nails, 50 rounds [13:46] * %Eris` breaks the roll [13:47] <~Hebizuka> *The roll of nails is now loose.* [13:47] <%Eris`> woops, i broke a nail [13:47] <%Eris`> :3c [13:47] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun looks at you with a half-zombified face of hatred for this horrible pun.* [13:48] <%Eris`> <3 [13:48] <%Eris`> ... [13:48] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: *Catches Eris's hand and DRAGS towards the next door.* Stupid, stupid, stupid. [13:48] <%Eris`> im not stupid, just bored :< [13:48] <%Eris`> !mrooms1 [13:48] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Unique door: 3885 - Roomstyle: 146 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [13:48] * %Eris` enters [13:50] <~Hebizuka> *You meet again with the MazeSlots machine! 3 credits ready.* [13:50] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: If only we could win the jackpot... ...three times... [13:51] * %Eris` pulls the bar [13:51] <~Hebizuka> *The rils are speening.* [13:52] <~Hebizuka> Row 1: T-Shirt - Bandage - Red cross [13:52] <~Hebizuka> Row 2: Lucky 7 - Lucky 7 - Pistol [13:52] <~Hebizuka> Row 3: Explosion - Tentacle - Skull [13:52] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: DAMMIT! [13:52] <~Hebizuka> *2 cr left* [13:52] * %Eris` pull again [13:53] <~Hebizuka> Row 1: Bandage - Knife - Bandage [13:53] <~Hebizuka> Row 2: Explosion - Crossed $ - Tentacle [13:53] <~Hebizuka> Row 3: Tentacle - Bullet - Condom [13:53] <~Hebizuka> *Nothing at all! 1 cr left.* [13:53] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: That's bull-... [13:54] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: *ahem* [13:55] <%Eris`> -shit [13:55] * %Eris` pulls the lever [13:55] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...yeah. that. [13:56] <~Hebizuka> Row 1: Explosion - Cherry - Lucky 7 [13:56] <~Hebizuka> Row 2: Red cross - Red cross - Pistol [13:56] <~Hebizuka> Row 3: Bandage - Amulet - Explosion [13:56] <~Hebizuka> *Sorry, better luck next time.* [13:56] <~SU_Tempest> *Your ally pouts.* [13:57] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: No fuuuuun... [13:57] <~Hebizuka> *Next special room at the 70th.* [13:58] <%Eris`> welp [13:58] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [13:58] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 5576 - Front door: 3833 - Right door: 3430 - Roomstyle: 280 - Enemy strength: 2 /6 [13:58] * %Eris` left door [13:59] <~Hebizuka> *You enter a mess hall. There is some food left on one of the tables, as well as a small object on another.* [13:59] * %Eris` checks the food [14:00] <~Hebizuka> [Food] Vegetable - Potato. 1d5 [14:00] <%Eris`> mm [14:00] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: You know, I half-expected we'd find a colony of Soldiers eating there... for some reason. [14:00] * %Eris` leaves it [14:01] <%Eris`> would make sense [14:01] <%Eris`> i expected to roll 3 tentacles back there.. just because of karma [14:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: How would you react if there was, like... twelve soldiers eating here? [14:01] * %Eris` shudders glad he didnt [14:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...yuck, tentacles [14:01] <%Eris`> hmm [14:01] <%Eris`> Grenade [14:01] * %Eris` nods [14:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ... *ponders* [14:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: You're positively evil! *grin* [14:01] <%Eris`> :3 [14:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: But oh well. [14:01] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:01] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 3937 - Front door: 3868 - Right door: 1748 - Roomstyle: 293 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [14:02] * %Eris` left door [14:05] <~Hebizuka> *You make it into a medieval room. There isn't much here, aside from a Guard Sergeant with a submachine gun, followed by two Maze Guards - one with another SMG, the other with a grenade launcher. They are apparently on patrol.* [14:05] * %Eris` just continues on [14:05] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:05] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 4255 - Front door: 473 - Right door: 3629 - Roomstyle: 50 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [14:06] <~SU_Tempest> GdSgt: ...and that's pretty much how you DON'T arrest suspects who look excessively horny. [14:06] * %Eris` left door [14:06] <~SU_Tempest> MzGrd: That sounds creepy. [14:07] <~Hebizuka> *An outside area! Daytime plains. You see an object on the ground...* [14:07] * %Eris` checks the object [14:07] <~Hebizuka> [Valuable] Metal - Worthless brass - Value 2-5 P$ (1d4 +1) [14:08] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:08] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 474 - Front door: 5949 - Right door: 2791 - Roomstyle: 325 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [14:08] * %Eris` front door [14:08] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun takes a deep breath, enjoying the outside air for a moment, before following on.* [14:09] <~Hebizuka> *You make it into a storage area. Again, not much stuff here, so it seems. There is another object on the floor here...* [14:09] * %Eris` checks said object [14:10] <~Hebizuka> [Valuable] Metal - Platinum medal - Value 300-1250 P$ (1d951 +299) [14:11] <%Eris`> a medal [14:11] * %Eris` pins to chest? :D [14:11] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: It's going to be hard to pin it to the chest without a pin... [14:11] * %Eris` fasions a pin out of metal.. [14:12] * %Eris` attaches pin to chest [14:12] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ... [14:12] * %Eris` wears medal like a millitary medal [14:12] <~Hebizuka> *It falls. That won't really remain on the HEV Suit...* [14:12] <%Eris`> .. [14:12] * %Eris` creates magnet [14:12] * %Eris` sticks to metallic hev suit part [14:12] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: You're bullsh-... ahem. [14:12] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: *Snatch medal* [14:12] <%Eris`> D: [14:13] <%Eris`> my medal! [14:13] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Put that in your bag before I put it in mine~ [14:13] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: You don't need medals, you have me. [14:13] * %Eris` puts it in bag ;~; [14:13] <%Eris`> .. [14:13] <%Eris`> <3 [14:13] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun nodnods and kisses your cheek.* [14:13] <%Eris`> so cute <3 [14:13] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:13] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 1847 - Front door: 2717 - Right door: 2223 - Roomstyle: 300 - Enemy strength: 3 /6 [14:13] * %Eris` right door [14:14] <~Hebizuka> 138.93/140 [14:15] <~Hebizuka> *You make it into toilets. No creepy ninja in sight! There is, however, a wicked youkai: an ushi-oni, and they don't look too nice...* [14:16] * %Eris` counts the number of oni [14:16] <~Hebizuka> *There is only one ushi-oni.* [14:16] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Eep... [14:16] * %Eris` raises crossbow [14:17] * %Eris` fires [14:17] <%Eris`> !mdice 2 6 [14:17] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 2 1 ] [ Total Score: 3 ] [14:17] <~Hebizuka> *Whizz.* [14:17] <%Eris`> .. [14:17] <%Eris`> goddammit [14:17] <~Hebizuka> *The bolt plants itself on the wall behind and breaks.* [14:18] <~Hebizuka> *Jun's turn.* [14:18] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun glances at you.* [14:18] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun pulls out her crowbar.* [14:18] <%Eris`> .. [14:18] * %Eris` grins [14:18] <%Eris`> i wonder if you can pry his eyes out [14:18] <%Eris`> :D [14:19] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: HOW DARE YOU NOT BE HIT BY MY ERIS'S CROSSBOW BOLT YOU ... YOU GROSS SACK OF .. OF... [14:19] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Oh screw it. [14:19] <~Hebizuka> *She rushes to the ushi-oni and attempts swinging her crowbar, sharp side ahead, towards the youkai's eye, twice!* [14:19] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 4 6 [14:19] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 4 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 6 5 6 1 ] [ Total Score: 18 ] [14:21] <~Hebizuka> *Score: 11, 7. The first hit does connect and reduces the ushi-oni's eye to a blood-spilling mush, but as the youkai begins screaming and suffering, Jun misses her second hit.* [14:23] <~Hebizuka> *Enemy's turn...* [14:23] <~Hebizuka> *The ushi-oni is extremely furious!* [14:23] <%Eris`> here oni oni oni [14:23] <%Eris`> :3 [14:23] <~Hebizuka> *It clutches its gigantic club, and attempts smashing Jun with it!* [14:23] <~Hebizuka> @bodyaim [14:23] <EliasBot> [BODY] Upper body (Stomach, guts) [14:23] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [14:23] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 6 5 ] [ Total Score: 11 ] [14:24] <~Hebizuka> *Your ally is struck really hard, and sent flying across the room - crashing back next to you. Though she has a mild concussion, she isn't suffering any damage.* [14:24] * %Eris` blinks a bit [14:25] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...Gross! [14:25] * %Eris` blins more [14:25] <~Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1. It's now your turn.* [14:25] * %Eris` blink [14:25] * %Eris` ..... blink [14:25] <%Eris`> O_O [14:26] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...Eris? [14:26] <~SU_Tempest> *The ushi-oni growls and whimpers some more.* [14:26] * %Eris` pulls russian knife of stabbing and leaps at the oni in a fit of rage attempting to burry the blade in his forehead [14:27] * %Eris` 3 times :D [14:27] <%Eris`> !mdice 6 6 [14:27] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 6 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 2 5 2 1 2 2 ] [ Total Score: 14 ] [14:28] <~Hebizuka> *Score: 7, 3, 4. Just like Jun earlier, you manage to hit the first time - driving your blade through the creature's forehead and just barely piercing the rock-hard skull. But your following attempt is missed as the furious pile of muscles sways and throws you off.* [14:29] <~Hebizuka> *Amazingly enough, despite you pretty clearly managed to penetrate the thing's skull and just barely retrieved your knife, the ushi-oni is still alive!* [14:30] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun looks annoyed. Cue pout.* [14:30] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Okay I've had enough of this. [14:31] <~Hebizuka> *She is still clutching her crowbar, and rushes towards the youkai again, going to stab it twice more with the sharp end of her weapon.* [14:31] <~Hebizuka> *Where? ON HIS OTHER EYE.* [14:31] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 4 6 [14:31] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 4 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 1 5 6 3 ] [ Total Score: 15 ] [14:31] <~Hebizuka> *Score: 6, 9. Unfortunately she trips and completely misses her first hit, aborting her second one.* [14:32] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: -oorf.. [14:32] <~Hebizuka> *Enemy's turn...* [14:32] <%Eris`> =w= [14:32] <~Hebizuka> *The giant youkai looks enraged. Now he's going after YOU. The creature swings its mega club at you, this time!* [14:32] <~Hebizuka> @bodyaim [14:32] <EliasBot> [LIMB] Right leg [14:32] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [14:32] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 5 6 ] [ Total Score: 11 ] [14:32] <%Eris`> O_O [14:33] <~Hebizuka> *With nearly the same strength as he did with June earlier, he strikes your leg, and sends you spinning once or twice in mid-air, before landing right next to Jun, in an amusing repeat of events.* [14:33] <~Hebizuka> *And again, you suffer no damage.* [14:33] <~Hebizuka> *End of Turn 2.* [14:33] * %Eris` spins and lands more like an ice skater [14:33] * %Eris` pose [14:33] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...So cool. [14:34] * %Eris` ahems [14:34] <%Eris`> enough of this [14:34] <~Hebizuka> *It is now your turn.* [14:34] * %Eris` pulls 1911, head aim, single shot [14:34] <%Eris`> !mdice 2 6 [14:34] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 4 3 ] [ Total Score: 7 ] [14:35] <~Hebizuka> *FT 4 +1 -1. Indeed, why stay away from the classics? Your bullet does just enough damage to kill the creature at last!* [14:36] <~Hebizuka> Eris Lilium (+Jun) [M1911A1] Ushi-Oni /H\ [14:36] <~Hebizuka> *The ushi-oni finally crashes on the floor, dead.* [14:36] <~Hebizuka> *End of fight! (3 turns)* [14:36] * %Eris` reloads crossbow [14:37] <~Hebizuka> Crossbow: Reloaded [Poison bolt] [14:37] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:37] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 5322 - Front door: 2453 - Right door: 4017 - Roomstyle: 50 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [14:37] <%Eris`> toilet oni [14:37] <%Eris`> :x [14:37] * %Eris` left door [14:37] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Poor maids will have a hard time cleaning that mess... [14:39] <~Hebizuka> *Another outside area! Daytime plains again. There is a strange creature here: a canaima - a half-human half-jaguar werecreature.* [14:39] * %Eris` observes it to see if hostile [14:40] <~Hebizuka> *You can't tell for sure, but it doesn't look like it'd curl up on your lap for pettings.* [14:40] * %Eris` picks up jun [14:40] * %Eris` runs to the door [14:40] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Kyaaa! [14:41] <~Hebizuka> *You make it the doors sticking out of the scenery, running past the canaima. Ninja!* [14:41] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:41] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 3835 - Front door: 5650 - Right door: 5659 - Roomstyle: 348 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [14:41] * %Eris` shoulder tackles through the right door [14:44] <~Hebizuka> *You barge right into a regular, featureless room. You feel your invulnerability has worn off.* [14:44] <~Hebizuka> *An object is floating in mid-air here!* [14:44] <%Eris`> o.o [14:44] * %Eris` looks at it [14:45] <~Hebizuka> *You have obtained the Amulet of the West!* [14:46] <~Hebizuka> *All shops and paid services will now offer a 10% discount on everything, and the value of all items you sell is increased by 10%.* [14:46] <~Hebizuka> *Do you want to pick up this Amulet?* [14:47] * %Eris` grab [14:49] <~Hebizuka> *One down, three to go!* [14:49] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:49] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 4717 - Front door: 3739 - Right door: 3263 - Roomstyle: 315 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [14:49] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Well... That was fast! [14:49] * %Eris` left door [14:51] <~Hebizuka> *You make it in an old forge. You see a weapon abandoned here on the floor. There is also a bunch of creatures sitting there; three fallen angels.* [14:52] * %Eris` glances at the weapon [14:52] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 5 Short: Dagger - Sharp/Piercing. Weight: 5 [14:52] <~SU_Tempest> FAng1: ...that other day. She was all, "you guys aren't supposed to exist!" [14:53] <~SU_Tempest> FAng2: Some people are crazy. [14:53] <~SU_Tempest> FAng1: Yeah it's not like I can make weapons out of my underwear, but still. [14:54] * %Eris` tries not to disturb them and heads to the door, they dont seem to be hostile to him [14:54] <~SU_Tempest> FAng3: Seriously? What's next, red-skinned succubi that can make weapons out of THEIR underwear? [14:54] <~SU_Tempest> FAng1: Now that would be interesting. [14:54] <~Hebizuka> *They're indeed not.* [14:54] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [14:54] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 1419 - Front door: 3918 - Right door: 1753 - Roomstyle: 173 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [14:55] * %Eris` left door [14:55] <~Hebizuka> *You barge into a storage area. An undelivered shipment is sitting there, and seems to contains interesting objects. The room seems, otherwise, empty.* [14:56] * %Eris` opens the shipment [14:56] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun looks around...* [14:56] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: No, don't move! [14:56] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Trap! *She points at a trip button.* [14:57] * %Eris` examines the trip buttong [14:57] <~Hebizuka> *It's a trip button... if you step on it, the trap will be triggered.* [14:58] * %Eris` notes it doesnt say push me so its bad [14:58] * %Eris` dodges it then checks the shipment [14:59] <~Hebizuka> =Weapon accessory shipment= [14:59] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: MPS AA-12 20-round drum magazine. Weight: 2 - [0/20] [14:59] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: AK-74 family; RPK-74 45-round magazine. Weight: 2 - [0/45] [14:59] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Magazine: SIG SSG3000 5-round magazine. Weight: 1 - [0/5] [15:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: What did you find? [15:01] <%Eris`> trash [15:01] <%Eris`> =w= [15:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Oh. [15:01] * %Eris` carries jun over the button [15:03] <~Hebizuka> *Roll a 2d6 to avoid the trip button.* [15:03] <%Eris`> !mdice 2 6 [15:03] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 3 1 ] [ Total Score: 4 ] [15:03] <~Hebizuka> *Click!* [15:04] <~Hebizuka> *You feel gas running... Suddenly you're starting to majorly trip balls!* [15:04] <~Hebizuka> *Hallucinogen gas!* [15:04] <%Eris`> .. [15:04] <%Eris`> oh shit [15:04] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: I can hear how good you taste... [15:05] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...Those colors! They smell awesome! [15:05] <%Eris`> .. [15:05] <%Eris`> duuuuuuuuude [15:05] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: I'm not a dude! I'm a shrine maiden! [15:05] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: You look like an orange! Can I bite you? Woaaaaaah, everything feels beautiful! [15:06] <~Hebizuka> *Three doors ahead.* [15:07] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [15:07] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 3378 - Front door: 781 - Right door: 4168 - Roomstyle: 113 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [15:07] * %Eris` opens right door [15:07] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Why are we going into a whale stomach? [15:07] <~SU_Tempest> HEV: Hunger 40%. [15:08] <%Eris`> hell if i know [15:08] <~Hebizuka> *You enter a regular, featureless room. Only one door ahead! There is a weapon on the floor.* [15:08] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: OH MY GOD [15:08] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: LOOK ON THE FLOOR [15:08] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: A WHALE! [15:09] <%Eris`> O_O [15:09] * %Eris` picks up the whale [15:09] <%Eris`> WHALE GUN [15:09] <~Hebizuka> *What it really is:* [15:09] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 3 - RPC Fort Fort-12 pistol | 9x18mm Makarov - Semi-auto | No accessory | Fort-12 12-round mag, +1 | Weight: 3 - [11+1/12] [15:10] * %Eris` fires the gun at the wall [15:10] <~Hebizuka> *2d6 it. Shots here will be counted as misses! Go on?* [15:11] * %Eris` never mind [15:11] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Poor little whale ;-; [15:11] * %Eris` throws the whale at the 3 giant peices of bread.. which might be doors [15:12] <~Hebizuka> *2d6 that too.ù [15:12] <%Eris`> !mdice 2 6 [15:12] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 3 3 ] [ Total Score: 6 ] [15:13] <~Hebizuka> *What you see: A handgun being thrown on one of the doors.* [15:13] <~Hebizuka> *What jun sees: The annihilation of pieces of sweetbread due to a whale hulksmash courtesy of you, a walking orange.* [15:14] <%Eris`> =w= [15:14] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [15:14] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 1870 - Front door: 2608 - Right door: 3862 - Roomstyle: 338 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [15:14] * %Eris` left door [15:15] <~Hebizuka> *You seem to see only one door, though.* [15:15] <%Eris`> !mrooms1 [15:15] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Unique door: 3303 - Roomstyle: 249 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [15:15] * %Eris` enters [15:15] <~Hebizuka> *Holy shit! A giant saucer!* [15:16] <~Hebizuka> *It's asking you for a room number, somehow!* [15:16] <%Eris`> holy shit! [15:17] <%Eris`> lets ride the ufo [15:17] * %Eris` puts in 2464 [15:18] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 1 6 [15:18] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 1 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 3 ] [ Total Score: 3 ] [15:18] <~Hebizuka> *The cosmic forces of SAUCER INC. teleport you into another dimension!* [15:19] <~Hebizuka> *...not really, just another room. A boring and normal grassy room. You see an interesting object!* [15:19] * %Eris` looks at weird thing [15:20] <~Hebizuka> [Valuable] Cash - Secret leprechaun pot of gold - Value 500-2200 P$ (1d1701 +499) [15:21] * %Eris` snags the gold :D [15:22] <~SU_Tempest> @roll 1d1701+499 [15:22] <EliasBot> SU_Tempest: 701:202+499 [15:22] <~SU_Tempest> *You snag 701 coins. All of them seem to have leprechaun faces carved on them. Each coin has a different expression.* [15:22] <~Hebizuka> *Total leprechaun faces carried: 1470 P$* [15:23] <%Eris`> dude.. i suddenly want some lucky charns [15:23] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: I'm a ho-oh! [15:23] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: I'm a biiiiiiiiird! [15:23] * %Eris` stares at jun [15:23] <%Eris`> you look like a butt to me [15:24] <%Eris`> a walking butt [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ... [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: PERVERT. STOP LOOKING AT BIRDBUTTS. [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Imma PECK you. o_o [15:24] <%Eris`> your not a bird [15:24] <%Eris`> just a giant walking butt [15:24] <%Eris`> o.o [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Yes I am ! Can't you see my beautiful orange feathers? [15:24] <%Eris`> nope [15:24] <~SU_Tempest> *She points at her HEV Suit. Which also looks like a butt to you.* [15:25] <%Eris`> butt suit [15:25] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Well we have the same suit! So you're a butt too! [15:25] <%Eris`> .. [15:25] <%Eris`> your a butt [15:25] <~SU_Tempest> *And indeed your own HEV Suit looks like a giant representation of your own rear.* [15:26] <%Eris`> in a butt [15:26] <%Eris`> .. [15:26] <%Eris`> WE'RE ASS ASS INS [15:35] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun pushes you(r rear) towards the Gates of Mordor (Redux Edition) that serve as doors.* [15:36] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [15:36] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 3183 - Front door: 5314 - Right door: 3337 - Roomstyle: 203 - Enemy strength: 3 /6 [15:37] * %Eris` right door [15:38] <~Hebizuka> *You enter a room that obviously is a radio room, because you see butterflies and ponies riding FM waves. Which strangely look like tidal waves. Maybe you can play with the @radio . You see what you think is a weapon on the floor - it looks like a giant maggot with a magazine up the ass end.* [15:41] * %Eris` glances at the maggot [15:41] * %Eris` points [15:41] <%Eris`> MAGGOT [15:41] <%Eris`> </soldier> [15:41] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon] Class 1 - Steyr M-AUG-GOT A1 assault annelid | 5.56x45mm WORM - Semi/Full | Scope(I), R. Sight(I), Foregrip(I) | M-AUG-GOT 30-round mag, +1 | Weight: 14 [15:42] <%Eris`> =w= [15:42] <%Eris`> @radio [15:42] <EliasBot> [The news] News broadcast with human hosts [15:42] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [15:42] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 2237 - Front door: 906 - Right door: 3739 - Roomstyle: 354 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [15:42] * %Eris` right door [15:42] <~SU_Tempest> News: Today on the news: worms worms worms worms worms worms worms worms [15:45] <~Hebizuka> *A warehouse room. You notice a box shaped like a donkey here, with the words "I CARRY STUFF" embroidered on one of its sides. You also see two creatures standing there: two Sasuke Uchiha fangirls carrying handguns!* [15:46] <%Eris`> .. [15:47] * %Eris` tries to focus he may be hallucinating but hes still got his wit.. somewhat.. tries to focus and see through it instead of giving into his desires [15:48] <~Hebizuka> *It's two prostitutes. Which doesn't change much. They're still bitches.* [15:48] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: *Grabs gohei.* [15:49] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: I WILL STRIKE YOU WITH THE FORCE OF ONE THOUSAND ZOMBIE SUNS ! [15:49] <~SU_Tempest> Girl1: What? [15:49] <~SU_Tempest> Girl2: Who the fuck? [15:49] * %Eris` wobbles [15:49] <%Eris`> duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude [15:51] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun wants to attack the fangirls. Do you want to do something first?* [15:54] * %Eris` too lazy to do anything [15:56] <~Hebizuka> *You skip your turn. Jun ASSAULTS the Sasuke fangirls with her gohei. Which Jun is absolutely convinced it is the head of Inferno Cop.* [15:56] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: THROUGH THE POWER OF FLAMING SKULLS AND PREGNANT WOMEN SHITTING TIDAL WAVES, I WILL KILL YOU! [15:56] * %Eris` too busy laughing to care [15:56] <~Hebizuka> *She attempts smacking the first fangirl three times in a row.* [15:57] <~Hebizuka> @bodyaim [15:57] <EliasBot> [EXTREMITY] Right foot [15:57] <~Hebizuka> *In the foot.* [15:57] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [15:57] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 5 6 ] [ Total Score: 11 ] [15:57] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 4 6 [15:57] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 4 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 5 2 3 3 ] [ Total Score: 13 ] [15:58] <~Hebizuka> *Scores: 11, 7, 6. Tactical foot breaking action, except for the third hit which she misses.* [15:58] <~SU_Tempest> Girl1: Ow! Fuck! That hurts, you crazy bitch! [15:58] <%Eris`> thats what they get for being sasuke fangirls! [15:58] <~SU_Tempest> Girl2: Imma shoot her! She's crazy! [15:59] <~Hebizuka> *Enemies' turn...* [16:00] <~Hebizuka> *The fangirl that has just been hit by the fury of the Inferno Cop Gohei is busy screaming insults, while the other one points her handgun (which strangely looks like a gun-shaped bone) at Jun, firing two shots.* [16:00] <~Hebizuka> @bodyaim [16:00] <EliasBot> [BODY] Lower body (Hips, pelvis, buttocks) [16:00] <~SU_Tempest> Girl2: Get the FUCK away! [16:00] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [16:00] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 6 6 ] [ Total Score: 12 ] [16:00] <~Hebizuka> *RIGHT IN THE BUTT.* [16:00] <%Eris`> THE BUTT BUTT GOT SHOT IN THE BUTT [16:00] <%Eris`> AHAHAHA [16:00] * %Eris` rolls around [16:00] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Owwww... Gross. [16:01] <~Hebizuka> *CRITICAL FANGIRL ACTION. Jun suffers extra damage. Which is, to say, still "not much".* [16:01] <~Hebizuka> [Ally damage] Pain 12% [+12] [16:01] <~Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1.* [16:01] <~Hebizuka> *It's now your turn.* [16:02] <%Eris`> ok fanbitch since you like ninjas so much.. [16:02] * %Eris` wobbles up to her [16:02] * %Eris` sadist blasts [16:03] <%Eris`> !mdice 8 6 [16:03] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 8 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 1 1 6 6 3 2 2 2 ] [ Total Score: 23 ] [16:03] * %Eris` completely misses throwing self for a spin and slams into the ground [16:03] <~Hebizuka> *BUT WAIT!* [16:04] <~Hebizuka> *Score: 2, 12, 5, 4. While it's true you have just catastrophically failed the combo, you still threw yourself at the second fangirl. You barrel on her with the force of a thousand suns...* [16:04] <~Hebizuka> *CRASH* [16:05] <~Hebizuka> @bodyaim [16:05] <EliasBot> [BODY] Lower body (Hips, pelvis, buttocks) [16:05] <~Hebizuka> *You hear something snapping dryly.* [16:05] <~Hebizuka> *The second fangirl begins screaming in pain. Apparently you broke her ribs.* [16:06] * %Eris` points at her with a serious face [16:06] <%Eris`> omae wa mou shindeiru [16:06] <~SU_Tempest> Girl2: AAAUUUGH [16:06] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: *Stares at you with an expression that seems to say "Did I just hear God talking?"* [16:07] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ...S-so cool. [16:07] <~Hebizuka> *Jun's turn...* [16:08] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT [16:09] <~Hebizuka> *Jun brings up her Heckler & Koch RubberDuckA3. Making use of her reflex sight, she dumps three shots in the first fangirl, and another three in the second one.* [16:09] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: TODAY, WE DINE IN TACO BELL [16:09] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 4 6 [16:09] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 4 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 5 4 3 5 ] [ Total Score: 17 ] [16:10] <~Hebizuka> *First burst: Recoil: 3. Shots 1-3: 9.* [16:11] <~Hebizuka> *Second burst: Recoil 3. Shot 4: 8. Shots 5-6: 7.* [16:12] <~Hebizuka> *Jun hits, and kills both of them at the same time.* [16:12] <~Hebizuka> Jun Setsuri [Rubber ducky MP5] Sasuke Uchiha fangirl #1 [16:12] <~Hebizuka> Jun Setsuri (+Eris) [Rubber ducky MP5] Sasuke Uchiha fangirl #2 [16:13] <%Eris`> i told you you were dead [16:13] * %Eris` goes through the corpses to find money, cosplayers always have money [16:14] <~Hebizuka> *You unfortunately do not find money. They were not cosplayers. They were REAL fangirls.* [16:14] <~Hebizuka> *They dressed like that every day.* [16:14] * %Eris` pouts [16:14] <%Eris`> stupid girls [16:14] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [16:14] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 1267 - Front door: 4984 - Right door: 2468 - Roomstyle: 212 - Enemy strength: 1 /6 [16:14] * %Eris` left door [16:19] <~Hebizuka> *You enter a corridor. Five doors are here, but to you the corridor looks longer than infinity and beyooooooond! SUDDENLY, NINJA. There is a ninja in the corridor.* [16:19] <%Eris`> O_O NINJA [16:19] <~SU_Tempest> *BUT WAIT.* [16:19] * %Eris` sadist blasts [16:19] * %Eris` waits [16:19] <~SU_Tempest> *That ninja looks like it came out of Daft Punk. IT'S A DAFT PUNK NINJA.* [16:20] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Holy shit, I can smell strobe lights! [16:23] * %Eris` sadist blasts the ninja [16:23] <%Eris`> !mdice 8 6 [16:23] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 8 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 3 5 4 3 5 3 6 1 ] [ Total Score: 30 ] [16:23] <~Hebizuka> *Score: 8, 7, 8, 7.* [16:24] <~Hebizuka> *You have successfully pulled off the Sadist's Blast. You sweep kick the ninja, grabbed it, spun it around, showed him pictures of baby shellfishes, then kicked him into another planet!* [16:25] <%Eris`> ROAR [16:26] <~Hebizuka> *The ninja was carrying a katana - and that katana is now resting on the floor. You disarmed your opponent, who looks like he's been hit by an elephant with pink bows on the testicles.* [16:26] <~SU_Tempest> Ninja: ... [16:27] <~SU_Tempest> Ninja: Where are the remains of the house that just crashed on my head? [16:27] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: THEY'RE COMING! [16:28] <~Hebizuka> *Jun's turn...* [16:28] * %Eris` musters up his best jim carry voice impersonation [16:28] <%Eris`> HERE WE COME TO WRECK THE DAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY [16:28] <~Hebizuka> *Jun throws a grenade at the ninja. The grenade turns into a GIANT MACK TRUCK speeding towards the hapless ninja.* [16:28] <~Hebizuka> *You hear the truck say "WRECKING TIME".* [16:29] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [16:29] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 1 2 ] [ Total Score: 3 ] [16:29] <~Hebizuka> *The truck turns left and speeds in another direction entirely.* [16:29] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Stupid driver! [16:29] <~Hebizuka> *Enemy's turn.* [16:30] * %Eris` falls over laughing [16:30] <~Hebizuka> *The ninja throws spaceship shaped shuriken at Jun!* [16:30] <~Hebizuka> *Well, it's just ONE shuriken. BUT LOOK. SHUTTLE SHURIKEN!* [16:30] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [16:30] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 3 6 ] [ Total Score: 9 ] [16:30] <~Hebizuka> *Tink!* [16:30] <~Hebizuka> *End of Turn 1.* [16:31] <~SU_Tempest> Ninja: NOOOOOOOO! [16:31] <~SU_Tempest> Ninja: Miss Jao will kill me! And then I'll turn into a Chinese farmer again! [16:32] <%Eris`> you mean chinese gold farmer right :V [16:32] <~SU_Tempest> Ninja: No! I farmed shit! [16:32] <%Eris`> wait.. [16:32] <%Eris`> jao [16:32] <~SU_Tempest> Ninja: And gates! I farmed a lot of gates in my youth. [16:32] <%Eris`> +_+ JAO [16:32] * %Eris` JUMP KICKS THE NINJA NOW CHANNELING MEILING [16:32] <~Hebizuka> *It's now your turn to wreck the DAAAAAAAY* [16:33] <%Eris`> JAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO [16:33] <%Eris`> !mdice 2 6 [16:33] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 6 4 ] [ Total Score: 10 ] [16:33] <~Hebizuka> *CHINESE STEREOTYPES !!!* [16:34] <~Hebizuka> *You deliver another kick to the ninja's already broken ribs, making him scream in pain and agony.* [16:35] <~Hebizuka> *Jun's turn...* [16:35] * %Eris` bruce lee impersonation [16:35] <~Hebizuka> *Jun points her SCREWDRIVER GLOCK at the ninja, then fires two shots.* [16:35] <~SU_Tempest> !mdice 2 6 [16:35] <~Hebizuka> [ SU_Tempest ] [ You rolled a: 2 d 6 ] [ Rolls: 3 6 ] [ Total Score: 9 ] [16:35] <~Hebizuka> *SCREWDRIVER IMPALEMENT* [16:36] * %Eris` pouts [16:36] <%Eris`> I was practicing my kung fu [16:36] <%Eris`> :< [16:36] <~Hebizuka> Eris Lilium (+Jun) [Crazy martial arts(+screwdrivers)] Ninja of the week [16:37] <%Eris`> !mrooms5 [16:37] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Door A: 4929 - Door B: 3566 - Door C: 2613 - Door D: 5862 - Door E: 3215 - Roomstyle: 218 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [16:37] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: But, but! SCREWDRIVERS. [16:37] * %Eris` takes door D [16:37] <%Eris`> DICKS! [16:38] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ..GROSS! [16:39] <~Hebizuka> *You make it into a bedroom. There is a butler made of very orderly bees, and a container that strangely looks like a big ballsack. Of steel.* [16:39] <%Eris`> .. [16:39] <~Hebizuka> *There is an object on the floor as well.* [16:39] <%Eris`> duke nukem must have left this here [16:40] <~SU_Tempest> Buzztler: Huh? [16:40] * %Eris` goes to the object [16:41] <~Hebizuka> [Weapon accessory] Muzzle brake, 10mm Auto [16:41] * %Eris` sees a car brake on a dogs muzzle [16:41] <%Eris`> the fuck.. [16:41] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun snatches it.* [16:42] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: That can go on my rubber ducky. [16:42] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: I just have to remove the oil filter I have on it. [16:42] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [16:42] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 936 - Front door: 5110 - Right door: 2154 - Roomstyle: 371 - Enemy strength: 4 /6 [16:42] * %Eris` front door [16:43] <~Hebizuka> *Jun removes the oil filter she had on her rubberduck MP5, then attaches the dognozzle on it instead. She keeps the oil filter in her backpack.* [16:43] <~Hebizuka> Ally backpack 128.35/140 [16:45] <~Hebizuka> *You enter a boring normal room with nothing in it. You notice an object lying on the floor... [16:45] * %Eris` checks the object [16:45] <~Hebizuka> [Item] A giant drill bit. It's colored bright green and yellow and has the portrait of Bill Nye. [16:46] * %Eris` shrugs and stores it [16:48] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [16:48] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 2128 - Front door: 2347 - Right door: 367 - Roomstyle: 107 - Enemy strength: 6 /6 [16:48] * %Eris` right door [16:48] <~Hebizuka> 139.83/140 ass hairs [16:49] <~Hebizuka> *Your stomach makes a rock riff.* [16:50] <%Eris`> .. [16:50] <%Eris`> duuude [16:50] <~Hebizuka> *You barge in a storage area. There is a box shaped like a huge singing clam here, which seems to be singing a David Bowie song, but in reverse. It also seems to contain ammunition. Also there's only one door ahead.* [16:52] * %Eris` looks at the ammo [16:53] <~Hebizuka> =David Bowie singing clam= [16:53] <~Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 12 gauge, buckshot, 20 rounds - Weight 1 [16:53] <~Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 10mm Auto, 20 rounds - Weight 0.4 [16:53] <~Hebizuka> [Ammunition] Belted ammunition box, 5.56x45mm NATO, 150 rounds. For use with the IMI Negev. - Weight 2.5 [16:53] <~Hebizuka> [Ammunition] 9x39mm, 30 rounds - Weight 0.6 [16:54] <%Eris`> !mrooms1 [16:54] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Unique door: 221 - Roomstyle: 253 - Enemy strength: 3 /6 [16:54] * %Eris` enters [16:55] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Hi, Elvis! [16:55] <~SU_Tempest> Clam: Toidi uoy on! [16:56] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun looks HORRIFIED. She RUNS to the next door.* [16:56] <~Hebizuka> *You make it into a regular room, where a fun shop has been set up.* [16:57] <%Eris`> fun shop o.o [16:58] <~SU_Tempest> Dealer: Hi. Welcome to my FUN shop. [16:58] <~SU_Tempest> Dealer: I sell FUN here. Can I help you? [17:00] <%Eris`> what do you have thats fun o.o [17:01] <~SU_Tempest> Dealer: I have FUN machines, ammo and accessories! [17:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: FUN MACHINES! [17:01] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: SHOW ME YOUR FUN MACHINES! [17:03] <~Hebizuka> Products for sale: http://pastebin.com/cccsXt3X [17:03] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: *stare* [17:04] <%Eris`> so shiny [17:04] * %Eris` stares at the flash [17:05] <~SU_Tempest> *This looks like a BLACK BOX. Except green. [17:05] <~SU_Tempest> Dealer: Oh, this? This is the M202A1 "Ponykiller" FLASH. Four-shot rocket launcher, which is also incendiary. [17:05] <~SU_Tempest> Dealer: Not effective against bees though. [17:05] <%Eris`> D: useless then [17:05] <%Eris`> !mrooms3 [17:05] <~Hebizuka> [ Eris` ] Left door: 473 - Front door: 345 - Right door: 3377 - Roomstyle: 207 - Enemy strength: 5 /6 [17:05] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: Noooooo ;-; [17:06] * %Eris` right door [17:06] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun makes grabby hands at the M202.* [17:06] * %Eris` drags jun through the door [17:06] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: ;.; [17:09] <%Eris`> =w= [17:12] <~Hebizuka> *You make it into a regular, featureless room. There is an interesting item on the floor.* [17:13] * %Eris` checks out the item [17:13] <~Hebizuka> [Valuable] Metal - Onion ring - Value 40-140 P$ (1d101 +39) [17:14] * %Eris` gnaws on it [17:14] <~Hebizuka> *It tastes like metal.* [17:15] <%Eris`> eww [17:15] <%Eris`> why onion rign taste like metal [17:15] <%Eris`> :< [17:15] * %Eris` stores it [17:15] <~Hebizuka> *Suddenly it dawns on you. It's not an onion ring. It's a gold ring made of ONIONS.* [17:15] <~Hebizuka> *And then Jun snatches it from your hands and stores it.* [17:15] <~SU_Tempest> Jun: MINE. [17:15] <%Eris`> .. [17:15] <%Eris`> you owe me then [17:15] <%Eris`> =w= [17:16] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun pulls off MAXIMUM POUT.* [17:16] <~SU_Tempest> *And then turns into a russian.* [17:16] <~SU_Tempest> *Jun evolves into Pout-in.* [17:17] <~Hebizuka> Ally backpack 129.35/104 [17:17] <~Hebizuka> 140* [17:17] <~Hebizuka> Checkout [17:21] <~Hebizuka> 526 rooms, 130 kills, 2 SEs, 13 missions, 5 Amulets, 58045 P$, 1 Run [17:22] <~Hebizuka> Progress: +20 rooms, +4 kills, +1 Amulet, +701 P$ [17:22] <~Hebizuka> Score: 1711 pts [+60] [17:22] <~Hebizuka> Leaderboards: 3rd (no change) [17:22] <~Hebizuka> =Today's stats= [17:22] <~Hebizuka> Shots 1/1 [17:22] <~Hebizuka> Melee 6/9 [17:23] <~Hebizuka> TOTAL: 7/10 (70%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> =All-time stats= [17:23] <~Hebizuka> Shots 179/216 (83%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> Melee 37/46 (80%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> Grenades 4/4 (100%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> Explosives 2/2 (100%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> Special 3/5 (60%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> TOTAL 225/273 (82%) [17:23] <~Hebizuka> =Other progress= [17:24] <~Hebizuka> Pistols +1 [17:24] <~Hebizuka> Martial arts +1 [17:24] <~Hebizuka> Youkai killed +1 [17:24] <~Hebizuka> No new awards